Dormroom Story

2010-10-09T18:05:00.002-04:00

Elvis once said Only Fools Rush In

John Lennon once said he's not the only dreamer

I once said I can't believe everyone goes through this

But we're all right in our own sense

I want to convince you that it's all just crazy

Because maybe, if you can just accept that

You'll just let life go where it wants

You'll stop trying to fight the bull

You don't always need to go positive

Or break-even

All I ever wanted in life is a little bit of love

To take the pain away

2010-10-04T20:00:00.002-04:00

I really wish I knew where to start

But I'm at a loss

Frankly, I'm confused and I keep being told

"Tim, don't worry, that's normal,

We all go through that."

But everyone doesn't.

There is the rare story

The beautiful glimpse of an imperfection

That just simply...works

Only Fools Rush In

I don't think Elvis understood

The strength of those words

When he read the lyrics

Which were handed him

In that studio

I wonder if he was filled with euphoria

Or maybe the same exact melancholic pulse

That's replacing my spinal fluid

I don't know

All I can do now is wonder

You left behind random things

That I'll never let you take back

What you left behind will forever be mine

....Let me start over

Only fools rush in

Elvis said it

Jason Pierce said it

I've said it

But yet here I am

Out of breath

Alone and jobless

In my apartment

in the City of New York

Thinking over and over

The actions of the past few months

And I just can't help but notice

All the times I didn't think

I just kept falling

and falling

I will love you until I die,

And I will love you all the time

So please put your sweet hand in mine

And float in space and drift in time

I like to pretend that when my emotions

Are screaming as loud as they can

Whether it be from sorrow

Or glory or passion or whatever

The weather loves to match

It just has to show off and prove it can be the best scenery

Today is no exception

Outside my window is a grey storm

The weather damn well knows there are no more curtains

To cover these windows

And there are definitely no more lamps

To brighten this apartment

So it's going to help me out

To show me there's a sun

A light behind all that mess in the sky

I'm rambling again

And I apologize for that

Maybe I should be honest

Maybe I should be blunt at this time in my life

Where I feel like I have nothing

But what's physically around me

And Hell that isn't much

She took everything

Not physically everything, some things of course were mine

But hey, she took the majority

She was kind enough to leave food

She was kind enough to not take my clothes

But the furniture, besides the mattress,

The kitchen stuff and everything in the common room

All went with her

I do have a pile of books although they were all hers

She had left them because "they'll help through this tough time"

It's always worse when she tells me how it won't be easy

I can't help the rambling

I can't help the ranting

I'm lost

I'm confused

I'm melancholic

I wish I was content

2010-07-29T04:06:00.002-04:00

Oh down by the waterfront

There is a young girl

and a pretty similar aged boy

Kissing and Kissing and Kissing

Oh down by the waterfront

There is an old man

and his rusty old cage

Crab-fishing and crab-fishing and watching Lady Godiva

Oh down by the waterfront

There is a young girl

And a pretty similar aged boy

Discussing what is coming

Both their Calendars are clean

Neither have any important dates

But Life at that age

Just seems so busy

There's never enough time

To just keep kissing, kissing and kissing

Holding hands never lasts as long as you'd like

When you're at the ripe old age of being young

2010-07-08T02:48:00.002-04:00

It's going to be running in circles in my head for a long time,

I can guarantee for a fact it will be burned into the walls of my mind

I'll burn a frame around the branding

Admire it every time I walk around my memories

The southern comfort in my glass will swirl around

As I think long

As I think hard

"I went wrong and there's no one to blame but myself."

I want a soothing voice

So I can ease the nerves of all the smokers

Who have their lungs filled with cancer

Sleep isn't even on my side anymore

I hate the metaphor of chapters in ones life. I always viewed as episodes on a television, seasons and arcs. Everything gets a bigger budget that way. I just find it a bad sad at who the producers decide to bring back from previous seasons. Make a new character, don't bring back a worthless one. Maybe their was a contract that still needed to be filled. Who knows? I don't.

I want to go to bed.

I want to go on vacation.

I want to be held.

I want someone to tell me I won't die alone.

2010-01-05T06:43:00.001-05:00

Read these:

Stranger in a Strange Land

Starship Troopers

Post more laterz lol

2009-12-15T02:12:00.002-05:00

Looks to seem you're having beginner's luck

Most people cut their fingers on the thorns

During their first day of work

But you have no problem trimming along

Picking along and holding the stems between your teeth

The petals really do reflect well in your eyes

and I think there's pollen in your hair

Oh, well since I'm known through the garden for being cliche

I must comment on the aroma in the air

Something is growing between us and well,

I think we should probably cut the roots before

It grounds itself in

You dress like an old woman

I don't know why nor do I care

I can't wait to see how you dress

Later on in life when you're all withered out

Take me to the movies

Take me out to sea

Take me to make-out peak

Take me for a walk

Take me out to dinner

Hold my hand while we talk

Stare deeply into my eyes

Tell me you love me

Tell me there's no one else

Tell me you could never replace me

Let me know how you really feel

I want you to hold me

I want to be only yours

I want us to settle down together

I'd love to have a home

I think I'm getting ahead of myself

But that's okay

There's nothing wrong with doing the same thing

Every other couple does on their first date

Thinking with our young hearts and not our minds

That's fun in it, right? Right...?

2009-12-14T23:04:00.002-05:00

He said to me the other day, "We're gold-diggers, you know?" I don't know why he says these things. "Really *insert name*? I thought we were just doing a service. Happiness does come at a price." His laughter always makes me cringe. It really reminds me of when I'd go watch my friends practice in their terrible band when I was younger. The drums always made me wince, always.

I want to see you looking right at me.

One day, you'll see, things were a lot better on this side of the sea.

Knocking down his door, you're such a big bad wolf. Huffing down on his straw, you're such a big bad wolf. Don't you pick on his stick, you big bad wolf, the food chain has no need for you. So go on with yourself. Pick up your feet and head out of this town. Let the pigs settle down and start families. We don't want you. We don't need you. You're a wolf and we have no need.

I never thought I could be so bold to take a stance against what was coming out of your mouth. Sometimes knowledge has to take a stance against babble bullshit. There's no point in letting you poison our youth.

Let the whales continue on their path. Giant Squids let them rest. Stop grabbing on so tight. Keep your suctions to yourself.

Stop drop and quit kidding yourself, we'll eventually pack up and move out of this band. I don't know why you're so bent out of the shape about the way things have been going. This city is seeing hard times but I doubt there's any place better. Keep dreaming of Barcelona. Keep thinking about the Gold Coast off of Sydney. Keep telling yourself the Big Apple has gone rotten but you've just out grown your own tastes. There's no reasons why you can't move to another borough. Manhattan may now be too young for you to grind against your waist but there's no reason, no reason Queens can't service you just as well.

And I think it's gonna be a long long time...

2009-12-11T03:44:00.001-05:00

FOR BOWIE

I'm going to move in with you one day just so we can share a bed and a montly rent. We'll switch paying the utilities because sometimes well, it might make it cute and romantic in that kind of lame way. Maybe we'll have different spots of the apartment to get our alone space or maybe just maybe, we'll have alone time in the bed together, not looking at talking to one another because couples don't talk when they're mad at each other. I won't talk but I won't have a problem triyng to find out if you're still ticklish at the moment

2009-12-11T03:32:00.000-05:00

"Here drink this, I need to talk to you about something. I got you a large coffee with a lot of sugar so you can stay up all night thinking over all the things you did that fucked this up.'

2009-12-11T03:27:00.000-05:00

I want to tell you about all the things I saw across this grand country and how they all relate to me. I'm going to go into every little detail about the red worn out barn I saw near Lake Michigan. I won't forget to mention the blue birds and the disgusting roadkill. I hope the stories won't bore you but I know you'll just be happy to see me, to hear me. Maybe someday you'll be able to write a novel with me about all the journies across the seven seas but I doubt it. Well, I know it won't happen because you're with him and he's with you, I was pushed to the side and that's just how life is going to be but that's okay because if he can get you to smile, well, then that's just how it should be.

THAT'S FOR BOWIE.

"I'm going to turn that into a really angry song with lots of breakdowns but it'll be beautifully written. WORKS THE BEST. NIGGAZ LOVE THAT SHIT!"

2009-12-06T20:18:00.002-05:00

Will I be a late 20 / early 30 hipster living in the streets of Brooklyn? Counting away all the hours in the day hoping something exciting will come my way? It's NYC. There's something exciting somewhere in it, right? Right? Is NYC still the best City on the face of the planet? Or has the crown been passed and we just don't realize it? We do tend to keep to ourselves on a personal level. Yes, I said personal level, government level, don't get me started. But anyway, yes personal level we have our noses in briefcases, laptops, palm pilots...wait..no one says palm pilot anymore, everyone says black berry. I just realized this now? Wow. I guess I'm out of my own generation's technological loop.

Everyone expects a point of interest or a plot. Forward movement. What is wrong with being stationary? Nothing. If you're content, if you're happy, if you want it to stay the same, why can't it? I know the World keeps moving. People keep growing. Things continue to change but you don't have to. Sure, you might be tossed to the side by everyone and everything, but you don't have to change. You can stay stubborn. You can be ignorant. You can choose to be thickheaded if you really want to. Someone is still bound to love you. It's rare to push everyone away. Some people, well, their legs are just cemented into the ground, into the blacktop pavement of the school's playground where you two would fight over which Power Ranger was better, white was obviously the best, or which Pokemon cards you wanted to trade and if the trade was fair. It doesn't matter the value of the card, the "coolness" factor outweighs any value of a dollar in a child's eyes.

I love the smell in the air of christmas season. Some people enjoy the presents. Some really like the holiday paycheck bonus. While others love seeing old friends and family and watching TV.

My hair is getting long.

Writing conversation never works well for me, so I just don't write it at all.

Can you get me some bread?

From where?

From there.

I don't know what you're point at.

So look.

I am looking, I don't see any bread.

It's underneath all that stuff.

Oh, why didn't you say that before?

I figured you'd know.

Well I didn't.

I'm sorry but just the bread is usually under stuff.

But how often do you see me use the bread?

I don't know.

Exactly, so why would you think I'd know?

I don't know, I just thought you knew.

I think you have a problem.

What?

I think you have a problem.

No, I heard you, what do you mean?

I think you have a mental problem, you keep assuming people know what you mean. Why?

I don't know, I just guess I think I'm pretty straight forward but as the days go on I find out more and more from people how weird I appear to be.

You don't just appear it, you are it.

I am it? Oh, weird, right. I guess. There's nothing wrong with that though, so I don't see the big fuss.

Well, you are right in that there is nothing really wrong with being weird. You're just not part of the average anymore. You're in your own column. Which unfortunately, I guess in norms, isn't the column you want to be in.

What? Why? Why not? Why is that a problem?

Whenever someone else is being weird, they aren't going to compare them to the majority since we now have you. You'll be the comparison for the first test to find out if someone else is weird. If they add up to you, then it's real easy to determine if they are weird. However, the problem also with having another column of people is, now we there could be another trial. While with you, yes we only had to compare you to everyone else. Now it goes, new person to you, new person to everyone else but only if if the first test doesn't show much result. Wow, this is going to be complicated discriminating.

So don't discriminate?

I'm realistic, I sort of have to.

You have to?

Well yeah, I just can't help but hate some people. Not because of their race or orientation or any of that, but just how they act. I hate some people based on how they act. I can't help it. Those people probably hate me too but that's fine. I don't think it's a problem if someone hates me and I hate them. Actually, let's scratch the whole word hate, I don't really hate those people per say, just really dislike them and I guess if they stepped out into the street and a truck was coming, they'd die only due to the fact of well, I had to debate long and hard on whether or not I wanted to save their life.

...I'm sorry I asked for the bread.

2009-11-17T12:49:00.002-05:00

Monday/Wednesday

History of India also Friday

1-1:50

Global Business & Economic Issues

2-3:15

Tuesday/Thursday

The Popular Arts As Business

11-12:15

Science & Spirit

12:30-1:45

Economics of Culture & Tourism

2-3:15

Concepts in Biology / Lab

6:30-9:15

Holy Fuck Tuesdays / Thursdays Are Going To Suck

2009-11-17T00:18:00.002-05:00

Care to shoot the shit?

Do you mind being an ear for my voice?

Or will it just be that you already know

What I want to say

I'm the American Classic

That's been sitting on your shelf

Ever since you were young

All your teachers preach

Speaking of the lessons you'll learn

From me

You're supposed to already know

What will happen

That's the beauty of it

Life isn't as easy as our parents

Want to make it seem

And life isn't as hard as the

TV makes it out to be

But trust me

You'll do fine

Find your balance

2009-11-11T00:33:00.003-05:00

I'd love to write the next American classic but you can't really shoot for that, can you?

What would I write about?

A troubled teen from Long Island?

So cliché

Sometimes you just have to close the door in their face when they say, "I guess this means, have a good life?" Maybe it won't hit you immediately after you hear the slam or even after you go downstairs on the Fourth of July to continue watching the Twilight Zone marathon but days later, weeks later, maybe months or well, actually, probably years, it'll start to dwell in your head. The weight will just sink in your heart and you'll scramble through your phonebook and search across the world wide web looking for their number or email.

Where am I going with this?

Drugs, Sodomy and the White Picket Fence

Welcome to my Life

You'll probably read through it

In one sitting

It's going to be an easy read

And that's the point

I want to be a level

That Everyone Can Relate To

The human body

Spirit and Heart

Aren't complicated

Don't let your science teacher

Professor or idol

Tell you otherwise

We are all the same

We are all of the same

Don't you fucking know what you are?

2009-08-25T02:06:00.002-04:00

My heart sinks everytime I stumble onto a hint. Things at this age never seem to get easier. Everyone at this point in time just seems to be a walking contradiction. It's rare to find someone who is well, simply true.

She's the most poetic person I know.

My neck feels like it needs to be cracked, popped, massaged. It's so stiff.

I'm afraid of what tomorrow brings. I love to plan out every detail and watch it all come into play. I like to dictate. I like to be the director. I like to take someone else's work and apply it to my nature but I'm always afraid something won't go according to plan. There will be a slip up. There will be some change. The main actors will be sick. The actress will get in an accident. The script rewrites will never be made.

It's a scary thought to know how it will all end.

I don't want to be a bitter battered man. I don't want to be afraid of love. I don't want to burn bridges. I don't want to bomb villages. I want to build cities. I want to ride trains.

2009-08-20T04:42:00.002-04:00

I wish Alaska in Winter had lyrics posted online.

I'm going to be living in a House with Six Other Human Beings.

I really have no clue what to expect from my life. I just hope a bed is waiting for me there in North Adams. I hope there is furniture for me to use. I hope I'm greeted. I hope I receive hugs, hand shakes and more. I wonder who the new characters will be in this year's season. I wonder who won't return, who will. I wonder about the cameos, the change of scenario and wacky antics. There's plenty of well developed secondary characters, I really have no clue where anything will go. I prefer it that way. I like it that way. I want life to take me along not just show me the way.

I want to be a better person not for you, not for them, not for my family but for myself. I've spent most of my life learning how to be on the offense, how to be on the hunt. No more hunting for me. I'm going to stand on the sidelines and smell those flowers. Maybe even plant my own. I'd like to say it's possible I'll start smiling but that really might be asking for too much.

24 Credits in Autumn

25 Credits in Spring

I'm a fuckin beast

Am I really going to go venture off to Japan to spread wisdom of the English language? I'm beginning to get torn. I want to see the World. I want to get out there. I want that change of pace. This part of the East Coast is starting to get thin. Maybe Philadelphia could be another home. I don't know how my brother waited so long to move out. I don't know how my sister has never left for more than a week.

Everyone should experience living on their own.

I want to learn how to sing, well, presentably and sing about all the typical love drama only the teenagers are used to.

2009-08-12T05:49:00.001-04:00

David Bowie you're so suave.

2009-07-25T04:06:00.002-04:00

Woke up, fell out of bed, dragged a comb across my head.

How do you top another musician? You do what he does best and make it better.

Those extra three seconds of I'm Looking Through You on the US version of Rubber Soul, just makes the song that wee bit better.

I'll never get tired of waking up next to you

And staring into those big ol' eyes

Oh come on, it won't be such a big deal.

Let's rent, not buy.

The market is much too high

For me, for us to be able to afford

The beautiful house on the beach

You always wished for

We'll rent now under someone else's roof

And save away those pennies

Until we can trade them in for pebbles of sand

On the shore

I promise you one day

You'll get the balcony looking out into the sea

I won't quit my job

And I'll keep myself still

Holding out through all the pencil pushing

Executive blood boiling office world

Just so can I get you the white picket fence

Around the kelly green grass

It sounds pretty cliche

But at that point in our life

I think that is what we'll need

To settle down and stop swimming against

reality's tough current

Smiles await you when you rise

I promise I'll be everything you want me to be

The musical talent of George

The peaceful soul of John

The maturity of Paul and

With a little bit of the gookyness of Ringo Starr.

Boy, you're going to carry that weight

A Long Time

I promise you I won't have any issues investing your love

There'll be plenty of buyers

Especially in such a heated market like the one

We see today

You would think families would stop ordering out

Put aside the take out

Maybe learn to cook for a change

But no, it's strange, they just simply can't get enough

Of what you do best

You will be this agency's ace in the hole

In this harsh economic climate

People are forgetting how to love

And I know, you'll help them out

Rain or shine.

2009-07-25T03:30:00.002-04:00

I'm a critic of everything. Maybe I should have my own column on the front page of Life.

Why don't I write like I used to? What is it? What's wrong?

So hear me out,

Maybe we should start to be a little more..

You know, what's the word I'm thinking of?

Cliche

That's it, you always know the missing words in my sentence.s

It seems to be that we're drifting apart from society

And I started to notice this when your mother

Bought us a new table cloth

And I just gave her a blank stare

Why do we need a new table cloth?

What's wrong with this one?

What's wrong with the one we have been using for seven years thus far?

I'm out of touch of reality and the norms

Maybe I should read more.

Where's my Catcher in the Rye?

My father would take me out fishing

Once a week, Every week

Throughout my summer break

He told me we were looking for Mermaids

We'd find the most beautiful two

And they'd take us away from the terrible

Place called Land

I'd always ask,

"What about mom? But...what about mommy?

We can't leave mommy. She can come too right?"

And he'd always say,

"She's not made for the sea, she'll be on land until the day

She dies."

When my parents divorced,

It hit my Father harder,

I guess because well, it was out of his hands.

He didn't want to keep carpenting,

His hobbies all fell apart and he took his savings

Bought himself a boat and left shore.

Mother moved to Tennessesse with her new lover

He's a lawyer

Not that it really matters

Well, to my Father it does,

He's convinced her new husband won her over

With his devilish looks and split snake tongue.

I wonder if he meant the sexual inneundo.

It's strange to watch your Father's heart break

My parents had seen mine shattered at least three times

"There's plenty of fish out in the sea."

Of course there is but you'll never find that one in particular again.

Maybe you'll find a new breed.

You'll get that better catch

But it's never the same fish,

Actually, if you set them back out, it could be

But let's take that possibility out.

I couldn't tell him that. I couldn't pat him on the back,

"Dad, don't worry, you'll find a better one!"

What catch will be better than a high school sweet heart

Who gave birth to his only son?

When he pulled into a dock,

I was the only one he called.

He'd only be there for a few days

If I wanted to see him

If I wanted to talk

I'd have to fly out there and meet with him

"I'll eventually pay you back for the ticket,

When I get it all back together."

I never let him pay me back.

"What have you been doing Dad, out on sea I mean? Thinking?"

"Mostly. I brought a bunch of calendars with me from previous years

I have been trying to pin point the day your mother stopped loving me."

Well that was garbage.

I wish I was a witty cynical bastard like John Cleese.

2009-07-21T18:59:00.002-04:00

Post 101.

I stared into the ocean yesterday

I went through trails in nature only a few blocks away from my house

Frozen Yogurt

Friendship, it's beautiful.

I wonder if anyone saw us last night.

Did they laugh when she couldn't find her keys?

Girls have such big bags.

"I stopped writing...maybe out of spite."

That's such a lame excuse on my part. I stopped writing because I'm afraid I lost it. I did lose something, the spark, the inspiration. I just need someone to be a fire in my life. I don't need a love. I don't need an emotional whirlwind. I just need a star to shoot for. I'm tired of games where I won't know the outcome. Let's write it all down on paper, shall we? Let's make the rules. Let's make the guidelines. Let's ensure it'll end with both of us winning, I'm tired of losing sometimes and I'm tired of seeing the female cry if the game doesn't go her way.

Transparency. Glass really can be a beautiful thing. The water can be beautiful too when you can see right through it. We saw a horseshoe crab.

I really want to do this one.

Okay, story time, ready?

I wonder when I'll figure it all out

Or at least a good enough portion

That I'll be able to say to my children

"Trust me on this...you don't ever want to do that"

When will my Sherlock Holmes instincts kick in?

Why can't I figure out the mystery?

---

----

-----

----

---

Can you open your eyes?

Okay okay okay okay, let's start from the beginning. I don't know where life will take me, I'm only 21 years old. Take it a day at a time. Let us do one step, let's two step and maybe skip the rest of the way down the block.

Frozen Yogurt. Walks around the block. Ocean dwelling sitting at the dock. Maybe we can buy this house or maybe just jump from place to place hoping it all works out. I want to do just what this situation needs me to. He stole your guitar hero and I don't want to steal your heart. Open up your open up your throat. Horseshoe crabs are never same when they're on their on back. Flip 'em over. Flip 'em over. Pick a park, pick a bench, I'll bring a book, you can bring yours. We'll read a few chapters and exchange them between each other every time. I'll take pauses to stare at the sky, you'll take your breaks to watch the swans float on by. You say it's an Alien. I say it's a plane. You say it's a Star, a Planet, nope, Aliens. I'll say it's a plane and I was right, there it goes, flying on by.

I looked like a 1970s Cocaine Dealer from Miami, if you can be seen with me in public like that, it must mean for something.

They blew up all their poppy fields. Serves them right.

I'm a New York City wonder. You'll find me next door to the city's boroughs. I'll live out on the Island and commute into the city's lagoon.

2009-07-09T04:27:00.002-04:00

Red Hot Chili Peppers.

Sit up straight, I'm on a double date.

---

My hair looks so childish. It has the hook like Lucas from Mother 3. Maybe I should bleach it blonde and wear his lame little outfits.

The windows are getting dirty. I think someone should clean them. We should probably clean them. I think a lot of things are getting dirty in my life and I think it all needs cleaning. I know you've been offering to help. I know you've been suggesting for a long time now to stop using the closet as a hiding place for my junk but that's just what I'm used to. I don't want you to help me clean. I don't need you to help me clean. I think I want to just sit and feel filthy.

We can go down to the carnival and look at all the old couples. We can look. We can watch. We can stare. We can talk about what we never were. I don't see myself being 70 with anyone sharing Candyfloss. I always found it strange the only choices are ever blue or pink. Once I asked my Father for a different colour because he was running the Candyfloss machine at the school fair and he mixed the two and made me purple. My father made me purple Candyfloss because why not? He could.

I know this is a pen. I know how to count by threes. There's no way I'd forget what comes after seventeen. I'll tell you how to play poker, rummy and solitaire. I could probably teach you how to build a home personal pc. I could teach a puppy how to sit, how to shake hands/paws, run and be silly but I can't teach anyone how to love. If I'm lucky I'll be able to go a long time without seeing another mind die. I don't want to be scarred. I'm too tough to be hurt. I'm too strong to cry.

Penny. Nickle. Dime. Quarter. Half-Dollar. Dollar. The half-dollar was obviously shafted. He's the younger brother of the dollar. He will always live in the shadow of the Bill. See what I did there?

One day I think I'll dump everything at University and move onto bigger and better things like the seven seas. Men among men will teach me anything and everything they know. I'll be able to tie so many knots and trust me, you'll see, I will arrive at a new dock somewhere in the caribbean with a better mindset or will I? Whenever I plan out tomorrow, yesterday tries its best to sneak up on me. Oh yesterday, you had your time and your chance but now today is here to show me the path and whether it's right or wrong I can always look towards tomorrow in hope I'll stay strong.

Jesus H. Christ

HIS LAST NAME IS CHRIST?

No silly.

Oh, look out!

Didn't anybody tell her?

So we're heading down to Philly to show the rents what it's like to be on your own and I don't think they're really ready to hear about all of the antics of my half-witted sister. I say she's half-witted because this one well, you know what, ask her why I call her, it makes for a better story after she tells your HER side.

Didn't anybody tell her?

Didn't anybody see?

Sundays on the phone to Monday.

Tuesdays on the phone to me.

Oh Tuesday, you're such a fucking slut.

Loud drums. Heavy bass.

I always picture myself, sitting there, staring at you in disbelief. Your mouth is moving a mile a minute, everything you're saying is meaningless, artifical, plastic credit card bullshit that you keep using and damn, well your payment is going to be so huge, I really don't think you will ever be able to afford to pay me back for all that time you wasted, wait what? I will always get coffee because I can't enjoy coffee anymore, and I need something that will last me forever so I can focus so much time and energy on that. Say something stupid? Sip. Retard? Sip. Mind-blowing dumb? Sip. Crazy? Sip. You'veGottaBeKiddingMe? Sip. Sip. Sip. Sipppp. I'll make sure of it that you always leave before me. I'll need to sit there and sip on that coffee while you're gone. "I can't believe she said all of that."

If you always get up late, you'll never be on time.

I'll be doing something important someday. I will be branding a piece of the World. I'll be building bridges, buildings and communication webs with my bare hands. That's speaking figuratively, don't let it get to your head. No, I will not be a construction worker. No, I will not be a social worker. I will be a crafter. Not of fine arts or pottery but of the social structors we'll need to thrive. Thrive. I love that word. I will thrive.

The kids are on fire in the bedroom.

If I do build an empire, I wonder if one day I'll just throw it away and hand it to the people, just to send a message to the other Kings and Queens. Everything you have will return to them. The heights of your tallest buildings will crumble and taste the ground. Your throne can't stay in the clouds forever. No peace treaty will remain war free. Up = Down. You need balance in your life. You can control somethings but not everything. Even with Legos and Play-doh, you can't do everything. You can't control it all. You're limited, the directions never say instruct that.

Oh come on, you knew from the beginning the concert had to end. The fireworks had to stop. Enjoy them while they last. Smell that flower, that rose, that violet before it dies. Your favorite musician won't see 99 neither will your parents. It's all stepping stones. It's all bricks in the wall. It's all building points.

What am I ever getting? I was told tonight, I'm rationale. I'm focused. I was raised properly to respect my surroundings. Most of the people my age don't. I criticize that and I yell. I bash and complain. I rip to shreds everything around me in hopes of understanding. Why? Why? Why? I'd tear it apart to the DNA if I could. I'll bring it to the Pearly Gates in the end if I can. I'm beginning to think, this is normal though. This is how it's supposed to be. I'm ahead of the game but I might be losing out on the time where the freedom is there for the calling before it's taken away.

This Is Life There Are No Right Answers

It's all a system. It's all their system. It can be your system if you choose to accept it but you don't have to. You do not have to play the game. Nothing forces you to play the game. You choose every day to roll the dice. You choose continuously over and over to keep picking up those cards. Take and play the hand you're dealt or fold and go home. You can even go all in if you'd like, I won't force you how to play your hand, I might suggest it, I might scream it, but I will never force you to play a hand you don't want to play. I might scold you tonight, tomorrow, for a year or forever about how you shouldn't have played that hand or how you should have but you know what, in the end, on my death bed, I will not take any of those moments to heart because it was your hand and you ultimately decide how it is played. Don't let anyone else play your hand.

Go out there and make a name for yourself.

Bring back the Wild West if you must.

There's nothing wrong with wearing a scarf. I find them stylish. I find them cute. I find them warm and everything in between. I love having a scarf that was made for me, made for someone and passed down through a salvation army to get to me. I love purple ones and blue ones and even pink, orange and green ones. I love them in the cold. I love them in the heat. I love thick and thin. I love short ones and ones that go down to my knees. They're comfortable. They're warm. They make me think of home and the ones I love and the ones that love me. I love to nap in them.

God made the Automobile.

Oh baby baby baby please, how long am I supposed to wait? I think about you nightly, oh can you tell I'm losing sleep? What am I supposed to do? It's hard to stay cool, when you smile at me, I get nervous everytime you speak.

My bed is too big for just me.

My bed, actually, is just perfect for me.

Did you know that I'm going to own this town someday and I'll change its name. I'll burn it down and start a new. I'll remove all traces of you because that is how I want it.

One day I'll paint the town your favorite colour and burn it down because well, simply that is how I roll.

Let's run away together.

You're not the Princess I grew up with.

What did you do with our Queen?

I ATE HER!?!?!

Blow out that Cherry Bomb, for me?

I love birthday cakes, I love cakes in general. The cake is not a lie and I hate to break the news to you but it's not funny. Memes are funny for a week. A month, tops. Well, that is according to my personal opinion.

According to my two cents, I have twenty pennies.

You're wrong, I'm right. He's lost. She's gone.

2009-07-08T20:17:00.002-04:00

So much facial hair!

Chad Vangaalen is so brilliant in all of the things he does but some songs mostly because of his voice, can just be so fucking eerie.

The bags under my eyes keep getting bigger. I want sleep. I want peace and quiet.

"I'll find you and I'll kill you, I'll find you and I'll kill you, I'll find you and I'll kill you."

I don't ever talk about my problems in great detail. I'm a story teller and to be a great story teller, you need to have an understanding of the task at hand, you need to be able to fill in all the holes with detail. I can't talk of my own problems. I don't know where they began and I have no clue when they'll will end. I need clear beginning, middle and end to discuss something on this kind of subject.

2009-07-01T22:02:00.003-04:00

I need to stop reading things about her.

Just take a deep breath.

I wonder if this is how she felt.

2009-06-30T12:14:00.001-04:00

This hurts more than I thought it would.

2009-05-25T23:13:00.002-04:00

test

2009-04-30T18:53:00.002-04:00

I should be getting a 3.0 this semester in grades overall. That's good right? I think. I hope so.

That's if it all goes to plan. FINGERS ARE CROSSED.

This class sucks. I'm not quite sure I understand the grading policy, hopefully my estimations are correct.

I really need to invest in an American flag. Not a cheap one from Walmart. I always stare up at the American flag on campus in front of Murdock Hall, just flapping in the wind. The sky is gross today. A very sad dark grey. It'll probably start raining soon. I want a big American flag. One that is made with pride. Wow, that sounds lame. I just realized, we say we're patriotic, not nationalistic, hm.

I really do want to go see the World but a part of me really does not want to leave this country. That part screams, "You can just go explore the West Coast. Try out Chicago. Maybe move down to Texas. Go see mount rushmore or maybe even the grand canyon. What's stopping you?"

Would I die for my country? Lyrics, movies and books keep bringing that question up to me. Dying is a scary thing. Would I die for love ones? Yes. Would I die for my nation? I'm not sure. I feel like I'd do more help alive than dead. Maybe if this were some Fallout 3 ending, sure but I don't expect that coming out anytime soon. I don't know how all those men fought in those world wars. I don't know how they had the nerve to just run out into battle. I can't believe they had the guts to charge head first into death. It does make me proud to have forefathers who did such actions. Tried to make our country and other parts of the World a better place. I wonder what a lot of them would think about this place now? What would 9/11 be like in their eyes? Would they be proud of the Bush administration? Be proud of the choice the nation made in Obama? So many unanswered questions. I'll never get the answers but that's okay, life has to be mysterious at times. I like to be mysterious, so I can't judge.

I can't sit still forever. I really hope Bowie gets that. I really hope my family understands that.

God made the automobile.

This dormroom story should technically end in one week because I won't be in a dorm in Autumn but I'll keep it going for one more year before I retire this blog and move onto something new. Maybe...

...the Aquaman World Conquest.

2009-04-29T23:08:00.002-04:00

School is 3/4 done. 3/4! That's more than half. 1/4 more.

Love Vigilantes is now my favorite song for this current period in my life. The Iron & Wine cover at least.

Bowie has been miserable. I hate it when he is miserable. I'm trying to convince him to come live with me in Autumn. I don't know if it would cure his blues completely but at least temporarily it would. We always promised each other that we'd get an apartment together but when will I have time? I don't know.

Iron & Wine makes me wish I could play acoustic guitar. Maybe I'll have Bowie or Ray teach me chords or just how to physically play chords. My hands cannot get like that, I'm a bassist dammit. Eh, not really a bassist. I can play bass but I don't. Ray plans on changing that in the Autumn.

I got a blue-ish rubber ducky today. I've been contemplating mailing it to Nick. I think he'd really like it. He does love Rubber Duckies and I think it'd be a sign of "Hey, hang in there buddy." Or maybe a lame sign of "Don't drown, keep on floating!"

Haven't heard back anything involving internships or the such for the summer. I don't know what the summer brings now, hopefully not another grocery job. I mean a job is a job in this recession. I'm no better than any of those people in the grocery stores but I just feel now it is a waste of my mind to be lifting milk crates. A part of me sometimes will say "You should have dropped out of college and became a grocery store manager," not because it's the smart thing to do but because it'd be a sign of balls, mostly stupidity though. College is obviously the better choice.

Will my plan work? MCLA -> Teaching in Japan -> Uni Down Under -> London or NYC

It's so far but so close. I hope I can have Austin or Bowie come with me to Japan or anyone that is my friend really. I don't want to get lost in translation. I don't want to be alone in Japan with 100 million other people. It's just a necessary stepping stone though to get what I need and want out of life.

One person can make a difference. Throughout our relationship she always told me that isn't possible anymore. She was wrong about a lot of things. She's still wrong about a lot of things. I do hope she is doing alright though. I wonder if she voted for Obama. She must have, hypocrite. But as Ray said today, "But I thought you were a fan of irony." I am a man who loves his irony.

After meeting and going to a Q&A today with Obama's campaign manager, one person can make a difference and can change everything that was yesterday. But there is a system. It is a web. One person can break his part of the web which may or may not eventually lead to the failure of the rest. There is no way of knowing until their sequence of events is over. I know I can make a difference. I wouldn't say Barack Obama, our current President, is the inspiration for me to be all I can be, to do the best I can, but he is another concrete symbol in my eyes. He stood up against the odds and won. I want to stand up agaisnt the odds and win. I do it frequently but I don't want to stop.

Will I be rich? Will I be succesful?

Kenan said to me I'm a big fish in a small pond and he wonders if I'll stick with that for the rest of my life. There's nothing wrong with being a big fish in a small pond, well there are plenty of things but can lead to a comfortable life as long as the fish is getting plenty of food and oxygen. He said MCLA is a small pond. Japan will be a small pond. Australia will be a small pond as well. In the business world, I will dominate my way to the top without stress in all of those areas but when you put an influence on a small pond, does word even spread to the surrounding lakes? Sometimes, yes. Far from always though. Going from Down Under to the US of A in the Business World is a very big leap. I am American, my Father was a vice president of sales, my brother a stock broker. I read the New York Times and Wallstreet Journal. I'm a double concentration in Marketing and International Business and will be getting Masters degrees in both, why can't I come back and dominate? Why not me? I would however love to get that degree in The Beatles in Liverpool.

"I never know what's going on in your head." "When I look into your eyes, I can never figure out what you're thinking." I hear that too often. Is that a good thing? Do people thrive to be mysterious or do you just happen to fall into it? I just grew up this way. I know my parents will be shocked when I tell them about going to Japan and then to Down Under. "I want to be a writer in the Berkshires at MCLA" was a shock to them. Apparently, my actions come off as a shock initially but when they relook and think it all over, they tell me how it made sense and they expected it always. My father tells me he sees me writing a screenplay and winning an Academy Award one day. Bowie's dad always asks me about how the book is coming along, a book that currently does not exist.

I just stopped writing to fill up my orange juice plastic container that is half a gallon. I prefer this over glasses, mugs, cups.

God made the Automobile apparently? Oh, I just finally understood what he said. *

****

9 friends are a fan of cuddling. Every friend should be a fan of cuddling.

I'm a fan of Gorilla Grape, Newman's Own, Rainbow Cookies and Wings Over/The Hangar.

Superman is boring. I don't know why anyone would want to be him. Being perfect isn't what it's all cracked up to be, I would know. har har har.

Aquaman is clearly the better superhero. Actually, Namor is way better than Aquaman in character development but Aquaman's outfit just well, rocks. I'm bias for orange fishscale spandex, what can I say?

I offer to you my hand and friendship through the terrible path of lava, black forests and the dark twisted caverns of the evil sister spirits.

Let's make a video game where you're the princess kidnapped and prisoned in castle and I'm the hero trying my best to go through all the dungeons in hopes of not hearing the bad news of "Sorry, The Princess is in another castle."

someone else has SaveMeAquaMan as their twitter account, fuck them.

God made the automobile to pass all the pretty girls.

The smoke by the side of the road, the blues lovin' boys in tow
To drive to the end of the day and bow to a borrowed flag
To ride all the brave and the blind, and men without men in mind

To pass all the things He made and then never bothered to name
And no one will tell the truth, and no one will hide it from you
Like birds around the grave

God made the automobile and I made a little boy
To pass on the blissfully young, the snake with a forked tongue
To praise on the wanting for time, and makes in the sleepless waves
The fear of the Black and the Jew, and blood for the camera crew

And passes the things He made and then never bothered to name
And no one can tell the truth, and no one can hide it from you
Like birds around the grave

NO MY FONT CHANGED.okie, i'm going to write before these lyrics BECAUSE I DO NOT LIKE THIS FONT, if get to this point, well, you already read everything else, this was supposed to be where the ****'s are.

My font is different and I don't like that.

2009-04-14T17:00:00.002-04:00

And the stare from her eyes

Penetrates deeply

Into the planned calendar

I've had pinned in my mind

For longer than I can remember

She's looking for her date

She's looking for her month

She's trying to find the years

In my life

To which we'll be together

July 15th

She's been planning that date

For quite some time now

Or so her friends claim

I hate being the bringer of bad news

But

July 15th

Isn't for sharing or mutual experiences

It's my date

My birthday

If I was young I'd flee this town

I'd bury my dreams underground

As did I we drink to die

We drink tonight

Far from home

Elephant Guns

Let's take them down

One by one

2009-04-14T16:51:00.002-04:00

It's not been found

It's not around

Let the seasons begin

It rolls right on

Let the seasons begin

Take the big king down.

I miss writing but I can never figure out anymore the right things to say. That's sad. That makes me sad.

I wish I could play the trumpet or something from the horn section. Something that could be considered classy and filled with lust. The bass is neither of that.

West.

Let's start brewing beer

To help us forget

It doesn't seem too hard

And the cost seems about right

We'll finally be masters of a trade

And after we've brewed enough

Made enough

I'll be able to take you on the vacation

You always begged for.

Let's start harvesting the grapes

So our wine business will thrive

I know you can't tell the difference

Between Merlot and Syrah

But that's okay

It's easy to pretend when your heart

Is pumping lust.

What the fuck am I even talking about?

I should be writing a paper not rambling.

Have you ever wondered what goes on

When the soldier returns home?

Nope, have YOU!?

I have one too many photo frames with no pictures inside of them.

2009-03-09T16:19:00.002-04:00

"If someone like you didn't smoke cigarettes, I'd wonder why. They're such a Tim Hughes attribute."

I've been wondering and thinking a bit too much since I woke up today.

Kiwis. You would never expect the outside to match the inside

But once you see both, it makes sense.

You're not exactly sure why the connection is there

But it's just one of those things

You'll never argue for the rest of your life.

She's a Kiwi in more ways than one

And it makes sense.

It makes total sense.

2009-03-01T03:25:00.002-05:00

Why do you get all the love in the World?

Don't you fuckin, know what you are?

2009-02-26T01:58:00.002-05:00

The scarecrow once told the children to listen for what the birds are speaking in their deviled tongues. The raven's midnight sirens never bring good news.

Despite what is said, the cornfield won't always retain your childhood memories. Replant the seeds of yesterday.

Mother never wanted to say

How your eyes weren't of

Your fathers

No one will know but her

Those golden hazel chestnuts

Were of a random man

From the bar down the block

Don't worry

Daddy will never know.

The pumpkin patch has never been the same

Year after year

Less and less people come

To sit on the hayride

That filled their yesterdays

World of tormoil

No more time for childish things

2009-02-14T21:30:00.001-05:00

Too Much Caffeine.

Too Much Milk.

Too Many Sprinkles and Coconut Macaroons.

BUT I LOVE IT!!!

2009-02-13T03:20:00.002-05:00

-Emiliana Torrini-

Today Has Been Okay

Friends tell me it's spring
My window show the same
Without you here the seasons pass me by
I know you were not new
That loved like me and you
All the same I miss you
Today has been okay
Today has been okay

The preacher lost his son
He's known by all in town
He found him with another son of God
Feeding on the prayer
Nevermind what God said
But love had lost its cause
And I thought today had been okay
Today has been okay
Today has been okay

Wind has burned your skin
The lovely air so thin
The salty water's underneath your feet
No one's gone in vain
Here is where you'll stay
'Cause life has been insane but
Today has been okay
Today has been okay
Today has been okay
Today has been okay

2009-02-11T21:31:00.001-05:00

I feel weird. It's not sadness nor depression. Maybe it's the lack of food in my system as of lately.

I don't eat so much lately, why? I haven't been hungry but that never stopped me before. This can't be good for me, I have a meal plan now though. And the school credit for the c-store.

What am I going to do on my own?

When I'm in Japan, will I make sure I'm eating all my minerals, vitamins, protein and carb intake? Or will I just save up and eat nothing but pork and rice because it's well, simply cheap?

2009-02-08T15:26:00.001-05:00

Guero by Beck is a perfect album.

2009-01-30T02:32:00.002-05:00

Say What Say What?!

Come on now, really?

Walking across the desert

Has become a cliche

Swimming the seven seas

Really doesn't make a difference

It's all about being here

It's all about the now

It's all about proving to myself

In front of you

That I'm as strong as fifty men

That I'm smarter than all of the

Novelists who wrote about

Winning over the soul and heart

Of women

The love of your life never seems to care

About your legend

Unless a part of it involves being with her

At home

2009-01-13T01:16:00.001-05:00

TQ32R-WFBDM-GFHD2-QGVMH-3P9GC

2009-01-11T19:13:00.003-05:00

Danny Elfman is doing the OST for Terminator 4. I'm excited. Anything Danny Elfman does is perfecto.

Giants lost, oh well, it happens, right? Can't win them all.

My gut has a knot in it and I want it to go away. Everyone makes stupid mistakes, I make ten. I try though, I really do try to be a better person after I make a dumb mistake.

Some things come to bite me back in the ass and that's okay, at the end of the day you gotta take what you're left with.

If you're left with nothing then well tomorrow you better start finding something to build with. You best.

I've done a lot of stupid things in yesterday but today is what matters and thinking about tomorrow. It's today. One day at a time Tim Hughes, one day at a time. Stop getting so bent out of shape over flaws, errors and mistakes. Stop getting so angry. Stop getting so mad over your mistakes. Stop getting mad at other people's fuck ups. No one is perfect. No one is fuckin' perfect.

It's 2009. I'm going to put it all behind me. Things from 2008 will come back to find me, definitely but it's a new year, I'm older, I'm smarter, I'm stronger. I will not let the past of the previous year come back to haunt this one. Simply because, that's not how I roll.

2009-01-09T04:15:00.002-05:00

The past month, I've heard quite a bit "I don't know what you're thinking," by many different people. Is that a good thing or a bad thing?

I NEED MUSIC.

2008-12-29T05:09:00.003-05:00

Spice up your blog with a little rum and whiskey!

I'm going to invest in a balcony. I always liked the idea of having a balcony.

Can we sail out to Mexico to steal all the tequila? No? Okay.

My blog posts never have a purpose but that's okay, I think it's okay, so that's all that matters.

Lately, for some reason, listening to the wind has been calming. Why? Beats me.

It seems to me

We're part time friends

Full time lovers

It's hard to juggle two careers

With so many mouths to feed

Kids these days...

Picking up addictions they don't even

Understand

I can tie my tie all by myself

Would you like to see?

I'm forgetting to see the point

Of where this is going

Between you and me

I know lately I've been shallow

But as of late

You're too deep

I don't really quite get the message

That is being sent to me

Via a bottle lost at sea

2008-12-29T04:56:00.001-05:00

Sweet summer night and I'm stripped to my sheets
Forehead is leaking, my AC squeaks and
A voice from the clock says, "You're not gonna get tired"
My bed is a pool and the walls are on fire
Soak my head in the sink for a while
Chills on my neck and it makes me smile but
My bones have to move and my skin's gotta breathe
You pick up the phone and I'm so relieved
You slide down your stairs to the heated street
The sun has left us with slippery feet
And I want to walk around with you
And I want to walk around with you
And be here with you and go

It doesn't really matter, I'll go where you feel
Hump for the breeze, get a midnight meal
I point in the windows, you point out the parks
Rip off your sleeves and I'll ditch my socks
Dance to the songs from the cars as they pass
Weave through the cardboard, smell that trash
Walking around in our summertime clothes,
Nowhere to go while our bodies glow
But we'll greet the dawn with morning blues
With purple yarns we'll be sleeping soon
And I want to walk around with you
And I want to walk around with you

When the sun goes down, we'll go out again
Don't cool off, I like your walk

I see the sound of the heat for the sound of the rain
It's easy to sleep when it whets my brain
It covers my rest with a saccharine sheen
Kissing the wind through my window screen
The restlessness causes that I cannot hide
So much of my mind that it spills outside
Do you want to go stroll down the financial street?
Our clothes might get soaked, but the buildings sleep
And there's no one pushing for a place
As we end up at an easy pace
And I want to walk around with you
And I want to walk around with you
I want to walk around with you
Just you, just you, just you.

yay new animal collective :D

2008-12-28T04:56:00.002-05:00

Oh Squalor Victoria, what HAVE YOU DONE?

Really now, let's figure this out, please? 20 isn't old, I don't know why I ever thought it was. What will I be doing with my life?

Who will make sure I'm alright?

I'm hoping I won't have to pick up the pieces sooner then expected, that's not to ask for, is it?

I need a hobby. I need an addiction. I need something to get me out of this slump.

Penguins.

It's 4:57 and I'm wondering if you're sleeping alright. Are you cold? Are you snoring like usually? Which side are you on tonight? The left or the right? How many pillows and blankets? I think it's cute when you sleep with all your clothes on but at the same time, it is a tad disappointing. You're adorable when you're drunk and not hitting or biting me. I miss you biting me.

My dreams of late haven't been pleastant. I was conned into getting a wife, settling down and having children. Maybe the dream was right, I'm afraid.

What City will want me when I'm older? What will be my home? Where ever it is, I hope there's a warm bed with cold pillows.

North Adams for New Years will it be all I plan it to be? Please, let's not start puking.

2008-12-27T05:25:00.003-05:00

I have no clue what this guy is saying.

2008-12-24T05:13:00.000-05:00

I need a haircut, badly.

Maybe I should just shave my head again? I really liked how it looked, many didn't.

2008-12-23T05:50:00.002-05:00

Frank Sinatra

Billie Holiday

Johnny Cash

Weather Report

Fats Waller

Bing Crosby

Elvis Costello

Miles Davis

You don't need no more.

2008-12-21T02:19:00.003-05:00

We're going to Coney Island, Baby. Tom Waits said, that's why.

It'll be a slow show this upcoming Friday but that's okay, as long as we get paid to keep the food on the table for next two weeks.

What The Fuck Am I Talking About?

Yes, I'm well aware of the things I've said.

I even remember all the stuff

People claim I said but no,

I won't let it get in the middle of things.

Why?

That's just not how I do things.

If you were to read my instructional booklet,

Nothing of the sort would be found within

Those 59 pages...five of those are warranty.

But where was I?

Oh yeah,

Lately my mind has been filled with dreams,

Thoughts and ideas of you and I

Sitting at a table outside of a restaurant,

Ordering food, laughing, talking about the

Old times.

When we were young and dumb,

Not even a clue with what was goi......

That's too cliche, I'm starting over.

The Berkshires,

They're far from cliche.

I could picture something going on there

An untold love story

Or a ravage slasher film

That would laugh up a storm.

Heisting it up since 1988

So you know,

Driving with the top down

Isn't such a bad idea.

Making those long windy turns

While the sunrises

Maybe we can catch a movie

Maybe we can catch the show

But before we go and take off

On this venture to Vermont

Can we please

Switch out that tape in your car

Because I'm tired of listening to

The same old Frank Sinatra

Collection and your CDs of Guster

Seriously, if I have to hear Guster

One more time, I'll swirve the wheel

And shoot us right off the mountain.

It's Tom Waits' time to shine instead.

2008-12-18T03:38:00.002-05:00

Get out of my dreams. That's not asking for much. It's truly being to sicken me.

"Yes, I think we've met before."

==-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-==

I like how that looks.

Season is over, how was the finale?

2008-12-14T16:56:00.002-05:00

The writers are back to work trying to figure out where the next season will go.

A main character is leaving and the potentional setup for a new one is very near, well it is no potentional setup, it's already concrete. Setup in the previews.

But really now, what's to come? How many new characters will there be? What will be the crazy antics? Will he finally get his shit together and come out on top on the subjects that truly matter? Who knows? Obviously the writers do but yeah.

I don't really have any predictions, just questions. Actually hell, I'll try and answer my own questions.

Will Kansas come back into play? Probably not, faintly if anything.

How's that Genie doing? Going to continue to be the rollercoaster ride.

Writing? Won't be around.

New main character? Definitely will be interesting.

This upcoming season I feel won't be as good as this one, although this one was very lacking in many departments, so much confusion, stress and conflictations. I don't think much will be answered in the upcoming one but I do think this next season will setup a lot. I mean, A LOT. You know me, I'm a die hard fan, so I can't wait.

2008-12-13T03:56:00.002-05:00

Post number 69

I should be working on a project but I prefer to do nothing instead. That's how I roll.

I'm going to waste away the night listening to spoon and thinking of you. Rocking back and forth in my chair, tapping my feet to the beat. La de da de da de da da da do.

Will I be here for New Years? I really don't know. I'm just going to continue to move along until I know where I want to go.

Blow out the candles for me, please?

There you go again.

Pale skin, mm, yellow dress, high heels.

Let's start a band with a horn section, you can be lead vocals, I'll be the walking bass line. Joey will have to learn to play something more than power chords and the rest of our crew will fill in the drums, trumpet and flute. It'll be perfect, you'll see.

AH CRAP BUDDY AIN'T ON THIS HARDDRIVE.

Let's just go back and reconstruct everything I've said. Pretend it never happened, okay, willing to try that? No? I didn't expect you to.

You seem locked behind that door, try to figure it out. How did you even get in there?

I let it go on too long and I forgot what I really meant to say, it feels like I'm dying, yeah it feels like I'm lieing and I don't even know the truth.

2008-12-12T03:15:00.001-05:00

Ooga booga! I hope I get to spend New Years with you. I miss sharing that day with someone I love.

2008-12-10T04:02:00.000-05:00

Do I buy it...yes or no?

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=11903079

2008-12-08T04:50:00.001-05:00

Where did all this frustration come from? We're going to travel out to sea About 31 knots in Until you're unable to see The land from which we came. There'll only be you and me and I hate to sound cliché, But that's apparently the only way You'll ever listen to me, Alone on a boat with no one else To distract you. Keep the rhythm in your life; Snap your fingers to the beat Like it's a song by Queen, Caviar and Cigarettes. Present yourself like your work; Dress up fancy like we're going To the opening of a VIP Art Gallery, Sol Lewitt's Final Piece. Keep your head up high; The war won't last as long as The General says. Be careful with that quick fist; Rome wasn't built in a day But London was most certainly Burned down in three. Despite what you think, I'm always listening. I'll probably never understand What goes on inside of your brain But, just like the ocean's current We'll have to deal with it when it comes. There's no way to stop every Sailor From drowning but, There's definitely a way to Prevent the majority If We Don't Panic...

2008-12-06T02:57:00.002-05:00

I played with a Kitty tonight. I really want a puppy or kitten when I'm on my own.

I'm happy because of all the little details in Life like fixing the bottoms of jeans so you don't rip them even more.

2008-12-05T03:22:00.002-05:00

Orange Juice and Cigarettes

That's the life for me.

City view apartments

Dirty Water Dogs

That's the life for me.

I want to have multiple homes

In different parts of the World

For each season.

Winter in Australia

Summer in the Caribbean

Spring in Japan

Fall in the American Berkshires

Let's get a cup of tea in London

Possibly in a random alley

Get a slice of pizza

In one of the five boroughs of

New York City

Maybe get bombed on sachi

While the lights of Tokyo

Penetrates our zen

I miss all the days which have become a blur

Movies during a rainy sunday

Tickle sessions which led to kissing sessions

Which led to well you know...

The way you can wrap words and people

Around your fingers

Makes my stomach twist

Help me understand this feeling

Mountain Dew Ew

Orange Juice yum yum num num

You could have been a pirate.

The weather today was poopy.

One day you'll see my dance, laugh and sigh,

"That's it?"

Told you I was nothing special.

I miss my Penguin, Octopus and Lion.

I've been talking in circles, angles and all sorts of ways

Sideways, Upways, Downways, Longways, whatever

The fuck Willy Wonka was talking about

In his crazy chocolate nuthouse.

I'm afraid of being alone over the break.

Winter Depression is the Worst Deprssion.

Damn you Santa.

Damn you Jesus.

Your gingerbread lane is merely chocolate

With moldy center.

I miss my diner, it bothers me they're no

Longer open 24/7.

Let's go to a Tool concert and do massive amounts of drugs and hope we never wake up in time

To catch our train back.

2008-12-04T03:08:00.002-05:00

Morning Bells

Wakey Wakey

Details Details Details

There's a stain on the wall.

I can't believe I never noticed before.

I know I probably come off

As distant

Lost

Gone

On the wrong train

Heading the complete opposite way

But I'm here

In the now

I'm listening

I'm watching

I'm picking up on all the little details

The way you're laughing

Standing and the awkwardness in your eyes

You're not leading the conversation

And I find that cute.

There's several rings on your fingers

Each has a story whether it be

From your mother

Or at a dollar store

There's a story behind everything

And I'll want to know one day

But for now, I'm quite satisfied

With just knowing they're yours.

I don't know where I'll be in a few months

Maybe in the same spot I am now.

I can't even predict where you'll be

In the next few months.

I hope you'll be where you are now

But who really knows?

Things change

Things happen every day

And when I think about it

When I rethinkg this past week alone

I'm very glad to know

Nothing happened to you

And my World would have stopped

If something had.

I really hope you learn piano some day

Play a few bars

While reading your poetry

Become a song writer

For the new teenage bimbo

She'll vocal your words off the papers

You submit

And I know you won't ever be pleased

With how it sounds through microphone

But when I hear those words

But when I read those words

I'll just be thinking of your voice

Telling me the story of what's currently going

On in your life.

I never want to be re-introduced to you

By a friend of a friend.

I won't pretend and lie,

I'll tell them yes, we've met before.

But maybe, if that does happen

There'll be a positive output.

A fresh popped cork from a new

Bottle of champagne.

I'm not even sure if I'm speaking

Metaphorically anymore

But it's the future

So there's no concrete way of knowing

Until the day comes.

But I just want to stress

I don't want there to be days

Where we're ignored.

Teddy Bears.

I could use one right now

Well, I'd prefer a Penguin.

2008-12-04T02:14:00.001-05:00

Something Is Hiding Behind Its Eyes

I remember baking ginger bread cookies

And using icing to give the ginger men frowns

In preparation of the feasts.

When I played G.I. Joes

I acted out the scenes in between war

Because it is there the true soldier comes out.

Snow Angels always seemed incomplete

To me,

Just lying there on ground.

You always said to me

"I'm going to design the city skyline,

You'll see."

I'm not one to doubt

And I never like to point out the obvious but

You're caught in your tornado of a World

Convinced everyone needs your breath

So they can breathe.

Well, sugar,

Maybe one day,

You'll see this city isn't big enough for me.

There's always a hidden message.

Read between the lines.

See what's roaring inside my eyes.

I want you to go to the library

And seach each book

Until you find a folded piece of paper

That a boy wrote for a girl

Back in elementary school.

Some crushes die and some live on

Doing the impossible.

Settling down and starting a family.

poetry portfolio

2008-12-03T14:28:00.002-05:00

Where did all this frustration come from?

We're going to travel out to sea
About 31 Knots in
Until you’re unable to see
The land from which we came
There’ll be only you and me and
I hate to sound cliché
But that's apparently the only way
You'll ever listen to me
Alone on a boat with no one else
To distract you

Snap your fingers to the beat
Like it’s a song by Queen
Caviar and Cigarettes
Dress up fancy like we’re going
To the opening of a VIP Art Gallery
Sol Lewitt's Final Piece
Keep your head up high
The War won't last as long as
The General says
Rome wasn't built in a day
But London was most certainly
Burned down in three

Despite what you think
I’m always listening
Never forget what we discussed
Out in sea

Seasonal Home-front

We're moving out to Autumn
To get away from this heat
The leaves are coming
But they're going to have to
Adjust and change
To the cooler breeze
I'm leaving behind
All my bright colors
In exchange for a more
Natural look
Dark red
Dirty orange
And plenty of leather brown

Your mother wants to move again
This time to Winter
I told her I hear it's rough there
If you aren't prepared
And I don't know if I am
With this current economic situation
I'm not quite sure I'm generating enough
Heat warmth security
To make it through a dark white night
In the town of Winter
I don't know about you kids
But living off of cocoa
Doesn't sound too good for the bones

I knew Winter was a bad idea
Maybe we'll find a better life
Out in Spring
The money isn't needed as much
And we won't have to worry
About personal expenses
Involving entertainment
Since the local community
Is apparently pretty friendly
Lots of fields
Lots of flowers
Should be good for the muscles
Maybe Spring will be
Where your mother and I will
Retire

Back to Summer so it seems
Spring wasn't what it was
Made out to be
I miss this town though
It keeps me going
It keeps me moving
I feel like I have a perfect figure
Whenever I'm living in the town
Of Summer
I don't know why we ever left

Transit

Showtime!
I’m heading out to the NHP Train Station,
I don’t know why you didn’t pick Garden City,
To pick you up from what you’re currently
Describing as “My most unfortunate adventure
To the rest of the East Coast”
I say you’re overreacting,
The rest say I never give you the benefit of a doubt.
People should mind their own business,
Maybe I should take that advice too.

Marlboro Man helps me through the day,
Jack Daniels picks me up at night,
But you, you prefer no help.
You chose the rabid East Coast and
I chose the comfort of the South.
We’re two very different people
Sharing a similar World.
I find that idea amusing but yet
You find it agitating.
When will you learn,
Not everything works in your favor
And I think we both can agree
The NJ transit is a perfect example of that.
No one will disagree about the hectic arena
Coliseum, most call Penn Station.

Women aren’t everything.
When will you learn?
Friends before Lovers
Family before the Rest
Blood is thicker than Wine
Maybe one day you’ll figure it out.
Maybe one day in Penn Station
It’ll hit you like a ton of bricks
Or to be cliché, a train.
You’ll look so lost and confused,
Just like a tourist’s first trip to NYC.
Maybe one day you’ll realize
You’ve got all that you need
Back at home.

Pepper

Illustrations and drawings always
Seem to make Peppers
Perfectly smooth
With the trademark slight curve,
But in reality smoothness
Is far from the truth.
Bumps, bruises and nature’s
Individual details cover
The thin spicy vine of the salsa world.

Wearing a tomato type top
With the stem dropping out
Reminds me of a sombrero on top
Of a worker’s head,
Relaxing in the shade,
Tequila filling his mouth as his soul
Fills with euphoria from the local
Acoustic guitar.

Oh pepper,
You give my tongue the extra kick
Of hotness, emotion and lust
I need to perform the tango with
My love.

The Legend Says…

They were on a freight train
Heading for a hole in the wall
In some direction
Neither of them is aware of.
Two hobos filled with the blues
Sitting in the cold
Listening to rich man blues
Through a discarded record player.
They’ll never be top chefs
But wait, what is all around them!?
Vegetables, fruits, some meat too?
These two lost men must have
Ended up on a train heading to the rich
Folks on the South Shore.
The rest of the train ride was filled with
Laughter, jazz and the best
Vegetable and meat soup you’d ever find
On a freight train heading to the South Shore.
Cooked, created and loved the
Newman’s Own Way.
Even the homeless have good taste buds.

Profession

You’re brutal, fine chef.
What did the cow ever do to you?
Nothing, Kind Sir.
I just love the taste of tender meat.

Why do you cut those
Flowers and wrap them in a bow?
Because Mother Nature’s wardrobe
Is terrible, I’m merely helping her
Win the fashion show.

Your art makes men cry
And yet you’re a stone, why?
My parents carved me the way
I am today.
Hunched over and chiseled,
My art is a rock’s inner beauty.

Oh, fat cat.
It seems as though you’ve
Become a stray, how come?
The life of a cat is not one
You’ll ever come to understand.
Adopt another to continue
The chain of Master Vs Slave.

Lastly, I ask you Father,
Where did your crooked smile
And bent up anger stir from?
Despite what you know of my past,
You’ll never quite grasp the mere
Passion and Pain of a past lover’s
Soul I lost to the thunderstorm.

The Clown Says

Her father was a jester.
He was a joker.
Man with tricks up his sleeve.
Constant laughter.
I never found him funny.

He gave me a mug from
The circus
Shaped like a clown face,
“Use it for milk & cookies,”
I used it for rum & whiskey.
Frequent laughter.
I never found him funny,
In that way.
How could I, knowing
What he used to be, an emotional
Butcher
To my wife and her mother?

Hiding behind that makeup,
Twisted,
I see through the powder.
Bright red lips,
Covering lustful secrets.
I know she’s not just your
Co-worker.
When will you see Clown?
You’re not a dog.
I know you can learn new tricks.
Show me.
Amuse me.
I know you can make me laugh
In the way you’re supposed to
But only if you try not to act
So pathetic.

Please don’t send in the clowns
I’d rather watch the circus burn down.

Random Thoughts of Mine

Butterflies have always been
My psychologists in nature
Beautiful from afar,
Ravage and repulsive up close.

Emerald eyes.
Pink frosting dress.
Yellow rose.
I can never forget the date of
August 15th.
The night we threw out our contract
Of friendship
And decided to make a new one
Under the profession of lovers.

My mother fought a sailor once
To stop a tsunami.
You’ll understand when you’re older,
I’m no liar,
Just a tall tale teller.
I speak in riddles, mysteries and sometimes
Metaphors, distracting you from the
Main point of my story.

Why does the sky only shine for you?
Not that I’m complaining of course
But you just seem to always achieve
Success when it comes to calling out
The sun.
How frequent do you think
The world is allowed to complain?
Once a week?
Once a month?
Once every few years?
Never?

Who really knows where
These atoms are going.
By atoms, I mean my feelings of course.

The Importance of being Idle

Sometimes you should just
Step to the side.
Let the cannon ball fly past you
Instead of being the brave idiotic
Soldier, who stands his ground
And takes the black iron
To the chest.

Sometimes it is best
To let your lover go to rest.
Hand her over to God,
He’ll know what is best.

Sometimes the smartest move
You can make is by backing your
Queen up a few spaces.
Don’t let the enemy take what is
Most precious to you.
Don’t ever fall into that checkmate.

Letting the forest burn down
In hopes a thicker greener forest
Will grow, can possibly be
Best for all of you as well as
Mother Nature.
You’re letting her grow that beard
Back in thicker.

Grown Up

We used to sit on the kitchen floor
Playing with the alphabet magnets,
Calling each other names and
Debating over who was better at
Street Fighter II.
I don’t care what you say,
When I play as Ryu
You stand no chance.

We used to try our best to study mathematics.
You’d read under the stars
While I chose the district stop lights.
Now you’re majoring in philosophy
And I’m on my way to master marketing.
Where did we go right
In this world of mass confusion?
Was it the chemistry explosion
Or the extra credit in History?

We used to write once a week
But I guess everyone was right.
Everything changes.
Water will continue to boil
Even when you’re gone.
Last I heard you were in the Peace Corps
Training third world victims
How to read and speak ‘properly’
And if you care to know,
I’m currently Down Under,
Doing what exactly? I’m not entirely sure
But I’m needed here
But I’m wanted here
But I guess I just miss how things were.

Your Friend’s Address

The house is a hand me down only due to rent
Jenga, blues, puzzles and funk.
A little booze to go with your smoke.
Balcony cigarettes have above the garden
While a refrigerator sits on the porch.
These empty PBRs tell the story
Of a home away from home.
Gracing friends and foe
With good tunes, jokes
And course,
Meatloaf.

How couldn’t you love fresh grown squash?
Homemade soup and wine?
A couch so comfortable your back sinks in
And you won’t want to move?
The random little occurrences when your shirt
Matches the pattern around you?
Or the way everyone greets you despite the fact
Some of them may not even know you?
You’ll come accustomed
To a home away from home,
Whether you realize it or not
Because when you’re welcomed,
Why the hell not?

Just watch your step in that kitchen
Because sometimes
A game of darts can be dangerous
But not even close to how dangerous
It can be
When someone is trying
To slap that bitch
Like she owes him money.

Autumn Blues
We were stereotypes
Driving with the top down
Blasting the radio,
Listening to Elvis sing.

You told me
Your calendar marked
Off the days until you could die.
I never kept a calendar.

I still remember
When you asked me to the rooftop
A quarter past midnight.
Autumn roaring,
Shaking its orange, red, yellow
And brown mane.
The city rooftops couldn’t
See down far enough
To know what beauty
They were missing.

The moon and stars out,
On the roof
You were dancing in an
Emerald green dress
With no shoes.
Emerald green will always be your color.
Your every dance move went perfectly.
Bobby D, Sinatra and Cash
Brought out your
Autumn Blues.
We were stereotypes
With nothing to lose.

As I stand there
Half smiling,
In my Father’s tux
The city trains roaring
As I hold tightly
A bottle of our
Favorite pink champagne
Waiting for your kiss
And to make love
Confirming our status
As teenage stereotypes.

This Family Means All The More to Me

Scenery has never been my thing.
There's a house on a hill where a family lives.
Snow hasn't fallen for over seven years
But that's okay!
The family has no concern for Global Warming.
By the time the North Pole has melted
And Santa is swimming
In between the sky scrapers of Manhattan,
They'll be long and gone.
It's okay in the town of Sommerville,
Where all the county's sugar cane is grown.
They'll be long and gone when ice no longer exists naturally.

The scarecrow in the field
Was the most dressed
Member of the family
With the least intentions of a career.

You seem to be forgetting
What goes on the inside of a child's soul.
Mixtures of Crayola colors,
Fresh baked cookies, snow angels, scraped knees,
Hopes of finding four leaf clovers,
Bed time stories and imaginary friends.
I'm sorry you missed out on all of that in your childhood.
If it'll make you feel better,
We can go to the supermarket,
Arts & crafts shop and bookstore.
I'll bake the cookies, pack a meal,
We'll travel out West to the sunflower fields, s
Setup a picnic, paint the scenery
And read each other children's stories
Until it's time to leave.

2008-12-02T02:58:00.000-05:00

I HAVE SO MANY SPELLING ERRORS, I'm going to try and ignore them.

2008-12-02T02:05:00.002-05:00

Scenery has never been my thing. There's a house on a hill where a family lives. Snow hasn't fallen for over seven years but that's okay! The family has no concern for Global Warming. By the time the North Pole has melted and Santa is swimming in between the sky scrapers of Manhattan, they'll be long and gone. It's okay in the town of Sommerville, where all the county's sugar cane is grown. They'll be long and gone when ice is all gone.

When Sarah's father was young, he was the king of carrot flowers or so I've been told. There's way too many rattle snakes in these fields. Her mother would stick a fork right into daddy's shoulder. Dad would throw all the garbage across the floor. Sarah would hide away in her room with her best friend, Roy, lying on the floor counting all the fake glowing stars on her ceiling until she'd fall asleep in his tiny pale arms.

Drinking isn't for pleasure when you're older, it's about escaping the troubles the day brought along for the ride. Mr. Jones always kept whiskey in his front overalls pocket. Working the sugar fields was tiring. Tobacco kept his muscles going while the whiskey helped shut off the part of his brain that always screamed "Go lie down and rest a while, check up on your pregnant wife." Jones never showed much sympathny even for his own blood.

The scarecrow in the field was the most dressed member of the family with the least intentions of a career.

You seem to be forgetting what goes on inside a child's soul. Mixtures of crayola colors, fresh baked cookies, snow angels, scraped knees, hopes of finding four leaf clovers, bed time stories and imaginary friends. I'm sorry you missed out on all of that in your childhood. If it'll make you feel better, we can go to the supermarket, arts & crafts shop and bookstore. I'll bake the cookies, pack a meal, we'll travel out West to the sunflower fields, setup a picnic, paint the scenery and read each other children's stories until it's time to leave.

Let's not try to figure out everything at once.

I'm heading up North to catch some lobster for extra cash. You're more than welcome to come but your new lover has to stay behind. Your choice, hun. Him and the innercity struggle or me and my open wilderness and all. The offer won't be on the table for long.

If my parents start crying, than I'll a dig tunnel from my window to yours. Yeah, a tunnel?

You make me happy in all the ways I don't want someone to.

And on the fourth night, I was walking home, chain smoking more than my lungs should. I've been squinting a lot more lately and I don't know why. Maybe I'm hoping I'll go blind so I don't have to sit back and see what's happening in front of me. Ooh cliche, you would like that wouldn't you?

Babies.

What do you want to hear? Bears in a house eating someone else's food? Princesses being saved by white knights? Slaying dragons? Slaying Trolls? Putting humpty dumpty back together again? I don't really know if I can stop the big bad wolf like I claimed many moons ago. I don't know where to start, really, I'm sorry.

Oh olga, my dear, you know my wishes are sincere.

She loved to dance and sing. Truly it was her heart rested, on stage but there were people in the World who loathed the idea of her becoming famous. Greedy, yes. Terrible, yes. Twisted, oh most definitely. The World is a cruel and unusual place, unfortunately for Layla, she would never be able to out run it.

Pick my heart apart like the pedals on a flower. It only hurts with every other tug.

Do you ever miss the days of yesterday? Today's too short and tomorrow will be here before I know it and I'm so caught up in the days of the year that I forget what month my mother's birthday is in it before it's already long and gone.

Wine. She wants Wine for her birthday because it makes her legs go numb.

I can hear the dust coming off that old piano, when was the last time you cleaned it? Really, when was the last time you cleaned it? Twenty three years ago?

I don't mind sitting on this porch every day until you arrive home. It's a price I must pay allowing you to run off to Kansas.

One day you'll be a poet, I just know it and before can realize what's going on, you'll be knees deep in prose.

There she goes off into the sunset in a corvette she didn't even buy. The wind trying to escape her hair while her life gets left behind. A typical long island girl, crossing the George Washington, having no clue what she is getting herself into without daddy's american express.

I wish I could sing you a tune your mother would hum every night when your eyes closed. I wish I could hold your hand and swing your arm just like your father used to. I wish I could be there for you like your brother was when your grandmother left this world. I wish I could be the lover like the guy before me obviously was before his unfaithful accident. I wish a lot of things lately and I'm not sure why. Maybe, I just want you to be happy.

Lemonade. Pink Lemonade. Pomegranate Lemonade. Blueberry Lemonade. You'll always be the ade to my lemon. I don't even know what that means but it's okay, you laughed a little.

Hi. Hello. Howdy Mister.

I'm Mister Jones, you're Ms. Jones, no relation.

Clap with the singer for awhile, it'll make him feel better and get the crowd going. You know you miss being the center of attention, so get on that stage with him and show him how the magic happens.

Say Goodnight.

Let's not try to figure out, everything at once.

I know you never want to get married to the man you love the most, you're caught up in this dilemma of trying to figure out what is best. So let me help you along the way. You're spending too much money on products for your hair. You should clean your car every once in awhile, it's been disgusting for as long as I can remember. The outfits you go out in broad daylight wearing are always much better than the ones at night. Smiling never hurt anyone.

Let's move to the city together, the suburbs is obviously dangerous for our blood. The stuck up house wives have been like parasites to your social life and you can't take it anymore, I've noticed your hair has been falling out, maybe it's time to see a therapist.

Mr and Ms/Mrs

Love is the remedy of the emotional cold

Can you hear it baby? It's the white noise of my heart, crying out to you about nothing.

Eyeshadow, used by men and women that want their eyes to be the light you die into. Lame, I know.

Come on now, we've been waiting for THREE WHOLE HOURS, WHEN'S THE FRICKEN BUS GONNA GIT HERE?!

It'll get here when it GETS HERE!

Birds of a feather, flock together. Or so I've been told by the National Geographic special that aired three mondays ago. I'm not entirely sure who to believe anymore. I can trust in these scientists of men about the menstrual cycles of ostriches and hippos or go listen to my local Priest about a virgin never having hers. You tell me, who sounds crazier?

Johnny, what are you doing with that candy cane? Be nice to Janey.

The Princess ran away from Home. Her Romeo wasn't treating her like the Juliet she always pictured she'd be some day. The hills are always bigger when you're at the bottom of them. Climb Layla Climb to the top. You can show them you're not like what they say.

Does it feel like you're dying?

She woke up in a struggle. Her eyes wide and pale as Snow White. Beauty was out hunting for the Beast and Peter Pan ventured to Wonderland because Alice called out for some Merry Men but Robin never called back.

I think I'm dying. I think I'm dying.

Iran - Buddy

Hey Buddy, What is wrong? After you waited so long. How can you walk away? You shouldn't care what I say. You don't even know me. Yeah, looks pretty good, I'd let you in here if I could But I don't really know how, still haven't figured it out just how I got in here. Somehow they all got it wrong and they all seem to like it that way. And I let it go on too long and I forgot what I really meant to say, it feels like I'm dying. It feels like I'm dying and you don't even know the truth. Yeah sorry I laughed, I wish I hadn't done that I'm such a dick sometimes. I haven't paid for my kind (?) and I want you to hear, Somehow they all got it wrong and that's how they wanted it to stay. I let it go on too long and it's like it had always been that way well now I know, well I know about it I fought(?) and I know what you thought and its so hard to make it this far and I'm sure I could help you a lot but buddy, I THINK YOU SHOULD STAY WHERE YOU ARE I THINK YOU SHOULD STAY WHERE YOU ARE I THINK YOU SHOULD STAY WHERE YOU ARE because I'm dying, yeah I think I'm dying. I think I'm dying. I'm just fucking with you(?)

---

And so it seems to go we don't even know where we're going anymore. You want to go North and I want to go South. I'm not leaving so can we make a deal and head west instead? I'm willing to bet they have a brewery just like the one we're heading out to.

There once was a yellow Kangaroo. He had not a care in the World and his fists were covered in red boxing gloves to show strangers he meant business. Why can't I write a story no matter how hard I try?

I'm a New Yorker, what can I say?

Is it lame that my heart melts whenever I hear "She's Always A Woman?"

2008-11-23T07:45:00.001-05:00

One last time

SAY IT WITH ME

You'll miss the ventures

To the South

I'll miss the ventures

To the North

Maybe we'd be better off

If we met in the wetlands

Instead of the desert

Perhaps we should have went hunting

Instead of to the movies

Maybe I'm not much of a kisser

But you're not much of a lover

So I guess that makes us even

Doesn't it?

Say it with me, doesn't it?

I don't know what I'm talking about

Anymoo :D

Cow in the sky!

Moo

2008-11-23T07:24:00.001-05:00

2008-11-23T06:51:00.003-05:00

Did you know?

My favorite color used to be blue

Now it's orange

I never space out

I'm just thinking too much

I wear a scarf to sleep

My first dream every night

Involves me being hurt

I can't remember the last time

I cried

I've felt an emotional blade

Far too often this year

I don't know what tomorrow brings

Besides laundry

I'd love to learn how to really cook

I want to go to Hawaii

I wouldn't mind working in a cubicle

If it meant a great window view behind me

Melatonin works better

If you think it will

My gloves don't smell the way

I want them to smell

My beard is growing more towards the right

Than the left

I can never say no to a cupcake

I used to have an obsession with

Beethoven and Mozart

My old room had a poster of the Sistine Chapel

Next to Jessica Alba

I miss Looney Tunes

I miss the simple days

I'd love to have a garden some day

I promise I'll throw a masquerade ball if I'm ever rich

I'm always training myself to not care for once

I'm thinking about finally getting my license next summer

If I get my license big road trip

Is it sad that on my 21st birthday I don't want to go out and get drunk?

I'd love to have a kitten or puppy one day

I really don't want to get married

Kids are out of the question too

I wouldn't mind being that crazy Uncle though

I wish I could get locked in a room with nothing in it

But books so i could finally get all my reading done

Alice in Wonderland has such a strong place in my heart

I wish I were a kid again

My right shoe usually goes on before my left

You make me think there's something wrong with me

Penguins are the best animal

When I go to bed I don't like light...AT ALL

I've never made a succesful Gingerbread house

I could go for General Tso's Chicken right now

I miss Mr. Cheng

Banana is in my top ten list of word usage

I'd love to go back to Montauk one summer with friends

I think Australia has been calling my name for far too long

I'm a righty

I have to open soda bottles with my left hand though

I DON'T KNOW WHY

I'm a black belt

Dry heaving is one of the worst things in the world

I get random pains a lot

No really a lot, it makes me concerned

I wish my hair didn't stick to the brick wall next to my bed

I could eat like a billion hotdogs or pizza bagels

It's a meatball hero, not sub

Just now I thought of dinner at home and could smell it

I miss my dad's lasagna with the little meatballs

I miss using a deep frier for funsies

Miracle Berries are quite interesting

I'm ever so thankful for these headphones from my brother

I don't have a good sleep schedule

I miss going to hockey games

I want to go to another soccer game

I enjoy plane rides

But I hate heights

That's all I want to write for now

Say Goodnight!

Goodnight

2008-11-23T06:34:00.003-05:00

Secrets

I always wonder if anyone knows my secrets

Or well, they're not really secrets

But just little things I do

Or have

That no one has yet to acknowledge

Or possibly notice

Recent things that come to thought

I wonder if they know:

They have their own spot on my buddy list

I always look up their stairwell when I walk by

Their book will be finished one day

I'm hoping one day I'll see them wear it

I'll miss them when they leave

I miss them that they're not here

Alone time is never alone time because my head doesn't shut up

I started because of you

How comfortable they are

How I rarely eat lately

I remember every little detail...

...And if I say I don't remember a person, name

Or event, I'm usually lieing

Chicken fingers and french fries will always be my favorite meal

Mozzerella sticks will always be my favorite appetizer

I wish I could make amazing nachos

I wish I could have chinese food right now

I wish I could start up a band

And then TOUR THE WORLD

I miss the simple times

2008-11-21T20:39:00.002-05:00

And I need to call Johnson

Let him know

The oven is on fire

And his cookies

Will never arrive

I'm sorry Johnson

The cookies are on fire

The bathtub is overflowing

I can't stop the faucet

If you learn how to play

The trumpet real well

You can join my traveling band

We'll dance and sing

Across the country side

You'll get paid five dollars a show

And eat for free

You can't beat that

Can you?

Come with me

Just come with me

Please?

If you'd like to know what's going on in my head

I'll tell you now

I'm afraid

Worried about what's going to happen

What is being brought with next semester

I wish I could play acoustic guitar

I wish the cold didn't burn my skin like so

And I'm going to hope things turn out better

Than I'm planning

Maybe you'll stay

Maybe you will come around

And tell me how you truly feel

Stop being a bastard

We don't have time for that

Maybe I'll get in awesome shape

And become a super hero

Maybe everything will make sense

Through the new bushes

I'll have to travel around

Come on now

It isn't as bad as you're making it out to be

Stop overexaggerating

Her lips don't get as cold

As ice

But you claim that its a fact

You can't argue fact

But I know for a matter of fact

You're lying through your teeth

Stop lying around

On a Friday evening

There are things that to be done

There are people

That need to be talked to

And you're just going to sit around?

You're just going to wait around?

You're not passive

You're not someone that sits on the sideline

GET UP AND GO GO GO GO GO GO

So Hello to you

I know you can see into my head

I know you can tell me what's

Being pumped around with my blood

Let's dance

Let's dance and sing

My name is Tim

I was born on July 15th, 1988

That makes me 20 years old

My favorite color is orange

I'm a big fan of music, culture and

Having an unknown sort of pride

In everything I speak

My personality comes off as always

Having a map

But I'm pretty lost in it all

And I'm just trying to get a hook

Into everything that passes my way

So when the wind blows

It won't all go away

I'm emotionally lost

And keep digging myself a deeper hole

Things used to be simpler

Now they're just complicated

I'll learn something from this

I don't really know what

But I'll learn

She'll learn

And maybe the bystanders

Will as well

You're not a robot

But you can teach yourself

To never feel like one

I don't need no cigarette, baby

I'm filled with enough nicotine

I'm light headed enough

And my bodies already falling apart

Why should I speed up the process

Because you're outside being cold and alone?

I'll rub your shoulders

Give you my jacket

And if it all goes well

I'll shake your hand

But that's as far as I go

I'm sorry but that's it

Magically bored

On a wide street corner

UPPERS AND DOWNERS?!

INSIDE OUTSIDE!?

WHERE HAVE I BEEN?!

OUT OF MY BRAIN ON THE 5:15

I miss the Bass Guitar

I need to bring my amp up

So I can woo those women

Who don't understand a thing

About bad guitar playing

2008-11-17T03:16:00.002-05:00

Hole punching in a straight line

Where did all those little circles go?

Loving is as loving does

Hold my hand tightly

As we cross the street

I don't want us to part

His bathtub was

Filled with shrimp, crabs and

Octopus tenticles

The ones which never sold

From the seafood shop

Because we all know

They've been soaking in bleach

But if I know

You know

And all of them passing by know

Why don't they do something ?

It seems to be

We're going down stream

Which means this

We're heading in a southern

East or West

Going where

I'm not sure

Heading where

I don't know

But we're stuck together on this raft

Unless you'd like to fall off

And end your life.

Please oh please

Don't you see

We're just sailing away

On this blackened sea

Please oh please

Somebody save me

There once was a sailor

Who always kept one hand

In his pocket

And I don't know why

And I really don't know why

But he buried all of his gold

At sea

Rumor has it

Legend has it

His treasure chest filled with booty

And valuable pleasures

Still rests at the bottom
But it's guarded by man eating sharks

Giant Squids

And Killer Whales

If we don't hurry now

We'll never make it

I always like to be there on time

To guarantee a good seat

I don't want to sit next to babies

And I'd rather not share a seat

With a man who doesn't know

Know how to hold his liquor

I can pick them out

I swear it

I SWEAR IT

She moved out to Kansas

To take care of a patient

I was told it was strictly business

My gut knew that wasn't her intention

In our room

Everything is just the way she left it

"I'll come back for it, I promise."

She was never taught how to lie well

But I guess that's why she went to medical school

And I went to law

Two very different people

Sharing a life

Maybe I was too greedy

Maybe she didn't care at all

----

Your side of the bed is still unmade

It's going to stay that way

Until you return from Kansas

Correction, if you return from Kansas

Oh well, loving is as loving does

And I guess Law school should have taught me

Well enough to never trust a stranger

You met off the street

Because all they're going to want

Is your money and then eventually

Walk out the door with your heart

Leaving behind the trust

You valued ever so much

December is just a day away

You always told me

The first snow of the season

Determined what the new year would bring

I never quite grasped that concept

But the young love we shared

Made me feel like I was open

To obscure thoughts of structure

Order and the world's true call

Maybe one day we'll meet

Face to face

In the city you were born

This time I'll bring the matches

And you're stuck with the loaf

When I'm with you

Nothing is ever said

Besides a question for a cigarette

Our eyes do most the talking

Our hands always fishing for our

Little lost secrets

I still don't know where you're from

But if asked

I could tell anyone

Exactly where to touch

To get a smile

---

The rubble just doesn't crumble

The way it used to

The sandbox is far from fun now

Oh come on now

You really didn't expect me

To move out to Kansas

You're a doctor

I'm a lawyer

Go take care of other patients

And forget about this one

I don't trade in hospitals

-----

Where did all this frustration come from?

I remember baking ginger bread cookies

And using icing to give the gingermen frowns

In preparation of the feasts

When I played G.I. Joe's

I acted out the scenes in between war

Because it is there the true soldier comes out

Snow Angels always seemed in complete

To me

Just lying there on the ground

Trying to picture all the twisted metal

From a car crash

Makes my brain throb

-----

We used to sit on roof tops

Spit down on streets

Arguing

Over which Taco Bell sauce packet quote

Fit better with our relationship

You chose the North

I chose the South

But we both knew

Our hearts lied in the West

For my birthday

You brought me out to the sea

And we played guessing games

Trying to figure out

How many knots away

A mermaid or treasure chest might be

Where did all this frustration come from?

We're going to have to travel out to sea

31 Knots

Until you'll be able to see

There's nothing out here

But you and me

I hate to sound cliche

But that's apparently the only way

You'll ever listen to me

Snap your fingers to the beat

Like it was a song by Queen

Cavier and Cigarettes

Dress up fancy like we were going

To the opening of a VIP Art Gallery

Sol Lewitt's Final Piece

Keep your head up high

The War won't last as long as

The General says

Rome wasn't bult in a day

But London was most certainly

Burned down in three

Keep your head on straight

Mostly for me

That's all I'm asking

Stay strong

For me

-----

We're moving out to Autumn

To get away from this heat

The leaves are coming

But they're going to have to

Adjust and change

To the cooler breeze

I'm leaving behind

All my bright colors

In exchange for a more

Natural look

Dark red

Dirty orange

And plenty of leather brown

Your mother wants to move again

This time to Winter

I told her I hear it's rough there

If you aren't prepared

And I don't know if I am

With this current economic situation

I'm not quite sure I'm generating enough

Heat warmth security

To make it through a dark white night

In the town of Winter

I don't know about you kids

But living off of cocoa

Doesn't sound too good for the bones

I knew Winter was a bad idea

Maybe we'll find a better life

Out in Spring

The money isn't needed as much

And we won't have to worry

About personal expenses

Involving entertainment

Since the local community

Is apparently pretty friendly

Lots of fields

Lots of flowers

Should be good for the muscles

Maybe Spring will be

Where your mother and I will

Retire

Back to Summer so it seems

Spring wasn't what it was

Made out to be

I miss this town though

It keeps me going

It keeps me moving

I feel like I have a perfect figure

Whenever I'm living in the town

Of Summer

I don't know why we ever left

2008-11-16T05:31:00.002-05:00

Randomly I decided today

I'm going to give away

All the things in my collection

Which shine the color of red

Red like the veins of your motherrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr's

Wrist?

Wait No

NOOO ALL WRONG LETS START AGAIN

I went down to the Four Aces Pub

Trying my best at a hand of

The bouqet of flowers

That rested ontop of the bar top

Maybe you'll go away

And fall away

Until I don't like where this is going

I don't like where you're going

I don't like that we can never say

Hey would you like to dance

Without it being that awkward

Bubbly feeling

Only teenagers get at their prom

Just talk from underneath

Like singers from the chest

Your doctor always said

There's a ballet dancer in your legs

Keeping the rhythm going

Down to your toes

Don't fall in the snow.

I don't think we click the way

We used to

Your gears are too short

Mine are just rusted.

My friends and I all went to see

What's going on in the valley below

Maybe there's a festival

Maybe there's a fair

Maybe nothing at all

We'll drive with the top up

Because Rachel doesn't want leaves

In her hair

And Bobby hates the feeling

That his hat might blow away

Plus no one really wants to know

Jason is blasting music

Most would say doesn't match the color

Of his skin

But it's okay we all have our own personal

Ways

There's a bottle of Jim Bean

There's a bottle of Rye

Whiskey Dry

Jack Daniel's on the table side

Sailor Jerry fell down the stairs

And no one knows why

The room is spinning

The room keeps spinning

And I can't seem to focus my two

Blood shot eyes

The Garden State is filled

With Toxic Waste

Thanks to Yours Truly

Go talk behind the waterfall

If you want to whine

Pink doesn't go well with bruise

And bruise doesn't go well with Maroon

So if you want to meet me at the butcher shop

It better be at noon

I'll have the ground beef

And don't forget the blood

My daughter wants hotdogs for dinner

But I think kielbasa will settle better

She's learning new foods

But her mother can't keep up

The bills are knocking

The collectors are coming

But that's okay

Because I'm here to say

I love beef.

2008-11-16T05:26:00.002-05:00

And one day it'll happen

Maybe we'll cross paths

At a random art gallery

I know you have your ties

And I have my connections

Bumping into each other

Doesn't sound as crazy as I thought

Free Champagne

Free Wine

Cocktail Dress for you

Probably with one of those crazy

Sol Lewitt designs

Geometry was never my thing

Blazer for me

Fedora for me

Aquaman t-shirt underneath

Maybe this time

I'll call us a cab

Maybe this time around

You'll come home with me

Maybe

----

You always said to me

"I'm going to design the city skyline,

You'll see."

I'm not one to doubt

But I never like to point out the obvious

You're caught in your tornado of a World

Convinced everyone needs your breath

So they can breathe

Well sugar

Well suga

Maybe one day,

You'll see

This city isn't big enough for me.

Quicksand is my favorite

Kind of ground

You'll get picked up by the Garbage Man

Because you know where they're going

And that's your home at 5 in the morning.

Punch right into my skull

Please

For the sake of all that is cinnamon and bazil

Orange is far from your color

You'll see

You got the monkey.

2008-10-27T02:22:00.002-04:00

It's hard to keep track of you

When you're all over the place

Where'd the romance of

Italian Sauce go?

Secretly I know you'd like to Post

Pack your bags my good ol' friend

We no longer need to travel?

What?

We used to sit on the kitchen floor

Playing with the alphabet magnets,

Calling each other names and

Debating over who was better at

Street Fighter II.

I don't care what you say

When I play as Ryu

You stand no chance.

We used to try our best to study mathematics,

You'd read under the stars

While I chose the district stop lights.

Now you're majoring in philosophy

And I'm on my way to master marketing,

Where did we go right

In this World of mass confusion?

Was it the chemistry explosion
Or the extra credit in History?

We used to stay in touch

But I guess everyone was right,

Things do change.

Water will continue to boil

Even when you're gone.

Last I heard you were in the Peace Corps

Training third world victims

How to read and speak 'properly'

And if you care to know,

I'm currently Down Under,

Doing what exactly? I'm not entirely sure

But I'm needed here

But I'm wanted here

But I guess I just miss how things were.

-----

Your side of the bed has been cold

For the past few weeks

But I'm learning how to be a big boy

And not care.

I know you won't be there in the morning

To make me scrambled eggs

Just like you used to

But that's okay

I recently bought a cook book

And can make the best flapjacks

This side of town has ever seen,

Your mother would be proud.

-------------

Red drapes never bring out
The gold in your eyes

Which is quite a sad thing to see

Because the tears seem to shine

What am I talking about?

----

It seems to me that what's in the rage

Is taking up different names

------

Come on now you really don't think
I was the one

We have to help Father bring

The refridgerator up the flight of

Stairs

Otherwise his back is going to go again

And we both know what will happen

I know you don't want the belt

To come out again

But that won't get you to help

Will it?

------

For some reason he would never

Sleep on his bed

I could never put my finger on it

But he just prefered to sleep

On the floor with a comforter

Pillow and tiny blanket

For a minute there

I lost myself

-----

What's shocking to me is how easily

You've out grown yourself

Where did all the dinners in front of the TV

Go?

Why haven't you called?

-----

2008-10-26T02:28:00.002-04:00

Can you meet me at the dusk

Which leads to dawn

Maybe we can stop my breathing

While we're at it

Because I think the coyotes will call home

Soon if we don't prepare supper at the kitchen

Counter

Come on now son

Venture with me

Just for a tiny bit

Travel the Australian Outback

Dip to the New Zealand Sun

Don't worry about the time so much

Because when we're done

We can just hop over the line

Maybe towards the equator

Start the day over

You would tell me tales

About the seven seas

And the potentional eighth

Even though maps don't say

Clark Gable once taught me

It's never what you got in your pants

But what ticks in your chest

The chemicals running

Up and down your spine

The electricity flying through out the brain

As well as what makes your soul burn

And no, he wasn't drunk

When he told me this stolen lesson

But near the end of his Life

An old man's last act of class

Handed down generation to generation

Mostly through film

Also audio recording

Have you ever been to a spider's wedding?

The food is to die for.

Keep the remember in November.

The rain in April

And the lion's roar in March

If you don't keep the sun in July

There won't be the autumn fall

For October and possibly September

What will August do if all the Watermelon

Stopped growing

And with it the pastel flowers of May?

January and December don't want to lose

Their snow so vote no on question eleven

Otherwise the terrorists will have won

And captured the love of February.

We all know June won't stand for that

With its Father's Day and all.

2008-10-19T00:13:00.002-04:00

Seriously now, we've gone over this a million times past

You don't remember how to love

And the therapist says probably never will

It's quite a sad theory in the World today

Where you can't achieve your dreams

Through physics, geometry or science fiction

I'm sorry kind deer

But your mother is gone

The hunter decided it was time

To have a healthy meat filling lunch

We're got on our hands a concentration moon

And I don't know where it's taking us

But most likely not any place soon

Diet Pepsi can on my desk

The rhythm of funk isn't in the soul

Not in the blood or the brain

But in the bones

It's the bone structure which gets you to move

You used to laugh about

All the times long ago

Now you don't talk so loud

Now you don't seem so proud

About your next meal

How does it feel?

You used to laugh about

My therapist keeps telling me

If you could open up my chest

My heart would be on fire

I told her she was unoriginal

Far frommotivated and overpaid

Not good enough for this Earth

No reason to get excited

Let's meet in the grocery store

No the shopping mall

How about a quarter past five?

You bring your kids

And I'll bring the cart

We can pretend we're married

And have always been

Your husband won't know

He can't find out

As long as he's at work.

Carry me home.

Strawberrys make the best kinds of apples.

I've been thinking this out for quite sometime

Maybe we should throw it all behind

Move on with our lives

Call it quits because really, truly

In the end, who gives a shit?

You'll lose my check, salary, bills

And classy upbringing

But that is okay, it is okay right?

I'm moving out to Long Island

To retire and live the Billy Joel kind of life

Drunken nights

Furious fights

Maybe crashing a car or two

They say those waters aren't what they used to be

But that's okay because

I don't won't have people who count on me

If people ask just tell them I'm patrolling Atlantis

What did all the good Presidents say?

How do I protect such a great nation?

Is there anyway to make the World a better place?

My words are those of third graders

And I don't mind

If I have the choice to dine whoever I please

I'll invite Hemingway, Poe and maybe Dante

No I lied.

2008-09-30T02:33:00.001-04:00

if you are going to embark on a generic, self-righteous soliloquy like the last message, don't expect me to dignify it with an answer.

2008-09-16T01:35:00.001-04:00

NO PIANOS!

2008-09-14T01:25:00.002-04:00

Jim Henson's dead. It's a sad day for Muppets everywhere.

Maybe it's the nicotine talking. Maybe it's the booze but I'm in quite a feeling of euphoria.

You'll grow up one day and look back at this all, shake your head and shout "What were you thinking!?"

We used to spend hours sitting on the kitchen floor in front of the refridgerator playing with the alphabet magnets.

When will you leave me?

When you finally have the love of your life at your side, always remember, if they're ever going to leave you, you can be certain it won't be on yesterday.

2008-09-08T00:52:00.000-04:00

I'm not a big fan of family reunions

Never have

Never will

Now, don't go around telling the press

I'm against family

Or I despise my family

Because that's far from the truth

Truly far from the truth

You just need to realize

I'm more about meeting in smaller pieces

Tiny moments spread across the Calendar

Where each different month and season

Is filled with the memories of potato salad,

Watermelon, bickering, resentment and

Hatred towards one's own blood line

When we all look back at the day's past

Most will say, "That's my family for ya,"

But not me

I'll never say or think that

--------

Please don't forget

This bottle of water isn't carbonated

Has a crisp, fresh taste

Filtered naturally in the great land of Maine

How could you resist a bottle of delicious Water?

How dare you rely on coffee to keep you going.

Why would you choose Johnny Walker,

Jack Daniels or Jim Bean instead of Aquafina

---

Showtime

We're heading out to the NHP Train Station

To pick you up from what you're currently

Describing as "My most unfortunate adventure

To the rest of the East Coast"

I say you're overreacting

The rest say I never give you the benefit of a doubt

Marlboro Man helps me through the day

Jack Daniels picks me up at night

But you, you prefer no help

You chose the rabid East Coast

I chose the comfort of the South

We're two different people

Sharing a similar World

I find that idea simply amusing

You find it aggitating

When will you learn

Not everything works in your favor

And I think we both can agree

The NJ transit is a perfect example of that

Women aren't everything

When will you learn?

Bros before Hoes

Friends before Lovers

Family before the Rest

Maybe one day you'll figure it out

Maybe one day in Penn Station

It'll hit you like a ton of bricks

The excitement the thrill

You'll look so lost and confused

Just like a tourist on their first trip to NYC

Maybe one day you'll realize

You've got all that you need

Back at home

College

2008-09-03T00:09:00.001-04:00

Despite cutting my finger, burning cookies and my iPod breaking, I couldn't be happier with life. I'm truly happy.

It couldn't get better.

Packing 2:58

2008-08-30T02:58:00.002-04:00

I don't want to pack. I don't want to leave at 9am. I don't want to do anything right now. I'd like to freeze time and re-think the past year over and over. Figure out what went right, what went wrong. What happened? What should have happened?

Theory. They can drive a man mad. Angry. Furious. But theory leads to creation and testing of the waters. I want to do that. Test the waters. Maybe there's sharks in the waters. I hate sharks. I fear sharks.

Let's break the glass. A Night of Shatter. In Honor of the leader. He's behind blue eyes.

Color. Colour. Color. Colour. Color. Colour. Gray. Grey. Gray. Grey. Gray. Grey.

I'm being told Color is correct but Colour is not. Gray and Grey are both proper. You're not proper so straighten the fuck up.

I should have finished honors ago and passed out. Hours of sleeping. I left this place a mess. I'd like to take my lamp and clock but it ain't happening sir. SIR. SIR PLEASE.

What are things I need to get?

Sticky Notes. Alarm Clock. Water. Crackers. A Soul. Dignity. Pens. Paper. That's all I can think of off the top of my head. Listerine. Toothpaste. Toothbrush! Paper Towels? Pretzels. Penguins.

Marlboro Red. Just flows so well. Marlboro Red. Marlboro Red. His tie was Marlboro Red. His shirt was Marlboro Red. His shorts Marlboro Red. His hat Marlboro Red. His soul Marlboro Red. I feel like Marlboro Red. The walls are Marlboro Red. He's smoking Marlboro Red. She's buying Marlboro Red. They invested in Marlboro Red. I want you to go buy me Marlboro Red. This is message from Marlboro Red. Marlboro Red wants you. Marlboro Needs you. Marlboro commands you. You want Marlboro Red. You need Marlboro Red. You desire Marlboro Red. This isn't a subliminal message because I'm being upfront. STOP CRAVING CIGARETTES ALREADY.

You like to collect sticks. I find marbles. Marbles = Marlboro.

I'll leave all my jewel cases for you to go through later on in Life. You'll go through each one and I'll leave games, puzzles and clues on how where my treasures buried. It'll take you years. Ages. Centuries. This is what you get for making me a target.

Some people wink with their whole face. Putting all those muscles into good use. At least I hope it's good use. Maybe it'll result in some passion between the two of you. You'll make love. You'll make babies. You'll make a home. You'll make enough cash to oil up the war machine. Society Security hun, that's where it's at.

Santa came down the chimney the other day. I was shocked and surprised but I applauded anyway. Dad deserves the praise for all the trouble he went through climbing up on the roof in that fat suit.

Airport

2008-08-29T18:45:00.002-04:00

I try my best to keep my promises. I truly do. So when I say I'll be waiting in the airport for you on your return, I mean it. I really mean it. It's one of the few things I'm serious about right now in my life.

Who do I turn to ? The brother who turned his back? The sister blinded in loyalty? The best friend who only has high hopes? I need someone with neutral coat of arms to tell me what to do. Was my theory right? Where are the scientists I hired to disprove my lack of reason? They probably too moved out to Kansas. Americana.

Chemistry. A man once said to me, "Boy you're going to carry that weight a long time." I smirked. I was well aware I'd get stuck with the load of the World's weight for years to come, but I knew that when I took the job.

Will she ever think of me when the vinyl we called ours begins to play? Will she have to leave the dance floor when the band sings our song? What will her gentleman do? Curse my name? Curse all I've done? Come find me on the East Coast of the Americas or Fly to the West Coast of the European Home front? I'm placing a bet down on burning all I've done. He'll stop at nothing to find the bridge connecting his lover and me only so he can burn it to the ground. It's not about economics he'll say. It's not about the social structure you two have built, he'll scream at her. "The issue is alliance and I don't trust his government, never have, never will! As he travels East, we will travel West!" What a sad boy he truly is. The World is round, not flat, catch up in the times.

Lollipops, Teddy Bears and Owls.

Will we ever meet face to face? In the epic tales of Life, most rivals end in a Duel. The most recent rivalry consisted of the Red, White and Blue against the Hammer and Sickle. Never face to face but just shouting from afar. Shouting builds fear. He has the home front. Most people with home front think they have the advantage. I never train on the home front. My advantage is instinct. My advantage is words. My advantage is I am everything you ignore. My advantage lies in the bushes behind your house. Why tarnish a man yourself when you can simply rip apart and destroy his image which leaves him for the dog civilians to devour. Why should I have all the fun?

Preview, Compose, Edit. You bring the piano, I'll bring the candles. We'll dine and dance the night away. No butlers or fancy champagne though.

Remember, this is not good-bye but just good night. I'm going back to Massachusetts, you're heading West. The best thing in the World is to love someone and they love you back.

Swing dancing. I've never been able to do it. I keep having dreams, you asking me to teach you. I'm sorry but I can't teach you.

I should be packing. I should be packing. I should be packing. I should be packing. I should be packing. Packing away. Packing the night away. You say goodbye. I say Hey. We'll pack the night away. Oh I can't hold you anymore. The time is almost gone. You're sad and I say Hey, tomorrow is another day!

Let's open a shop in the middle of Arkansas. We can settle clocks, forks and table cloths. I'll do stock and repairs. You run the register and maybe we can throw together a summer fair. All the kids can come. All the relatives too. We'll put up flier in our local penny saver and see how it goes. Funnel cake, Snowcones and cotton candy. Clowns, balloons and water gun games. It'll be great. We'll be happy. Everyone will shout, "We're having so much fun, I don't care about anywhere else."

Labels for this post: Memory, Emotion, Giants, Roller-coasters, Fish, Fun, Favoritism, Cooking Classes and Magnetic Pulses.

Come on and dance with me. Take off your shoes, kick your socks to the side. We're going to have a real good night.

No guys ever really care.

Fuck The Academy

2008-08-25T04:18:00.004-04:00

I'm tired of the same ol' same ol'. I'm disgusted with the way you present yourself and expect us to give pity. I walked across the street today and felt the pride of my innerchild. I know that tomorrow will bring something but what it may be is really beyond me. I'm well aware that you hate me for who I truly am and that's what I love about you. You'll tell your children about me when you see my face in the paper. You never liked me much but your parents couldn't get enough of me, and that says a lot about who you are today. Thank you for that kick in the wrong direction.

Ugh...Fuck the Academy.

I don't want to know what you did yesterday or the day before. The weeks that have been building up in your life obviously made and crarfted what you are today, who you are today. That's all that matters to me right now. What I'm blabbering about of course is that you're standing here with me today. Fuck yesterday. Fuck the day before yesterday. Today you're with me. Maybe tomorrow you'll leave and if that's the case, so be it. People tend to hold value in the length, the quantity, while I'm a man of quality. Who said you have to be with someone for years to love them? I say love at first sight is enough in my book. Believe in me when I say you're the most beautiful person in my life right now. Oh and there's the obvious...

Fuck the Academy.

Wow. You really need to start lifting those weights. I can't help but notice you're constantly struggling with the same things in your life that I am. Maybe we should work together. Let's become a pair. We can fight crime any day of the week. There is one catch though, you will be the sidekick. You'll be the one that I never give recognition to. The newspaper will rarely capture your essence in photos. We both know the public will not care for you and that's fine by me. You'll have to learn to adjust and accept the fact that you're half the person I am. Get used to it, sidekick. We're here to follow the norm, not break it and set our own example. If we did that, that'd be pure blasphemy.

Oh you know where I'm going with this...

Fuck The Academy

"I hope you come crawling back to me with flowers and maybe even chocolates, pleading for me to take you back. I want to see you beg for my forgiveness and love. I'll lie and say you leaving to find yourself across the Globe really broke my heart and I missed you so very much. But the truth is I'm glad you didn't find what you were looking for, you were wrong Tim Hughes and nothing makes me happier than to be the one to tell you that.

You're wrong Tim Hughes, You're Wrong."

I always expect the worst in Life, so it's all good.

No matter where I end up, No matter who I end up with, I won't stop saying…

Fuck the Academy.

A man on the street I had never seen before came up to me and said "Sir, I think you dropped your wallet." I don't even have a wallet but all I could do was smile, nod and say simply "Why thank you, I can't believe I didn't notice. Is there any way I could repay you? Oh I know!" I reached into that wallet and started to flip through the bills. Five hundred thrirty three American Dollars. "Here, take this fifty." He declined but I insisted, "Trust me, giving away this money doesn't phase me in the least bit." That's when it hit me how sad of a human being I've become. I don't even care that I'm giving away someone else's money. Self pity is something that's not supposed to be on the school agenda but always ends up getting taught anyway. Such a shame...

Fuck the Academy.

Distance, they say it's a killer. To travel the distance it really takes strength, endurance and concentration. I have none of that but I still want to try. Despite what everyone has told me my whole life, hope can succeed. You say, "Hun, move on, there's someone better than me out there," and I understand where you're coming from but sometimes the best isn't what's right for you. Maybe there is somebody truly perfect around the corner from here, but why live a perfect life? It's the imperfections that truly make the World a beautiful fucked up place. So what do you say? Come on now, say it with me...

Fuck the Academy.

It'll never be the same and you know that. Despite your hatred for this shirt, I will wear it proud. This hat has rested on my head for years and I know you never liked it. I'm well aware orange isn't a color of grace. I also have learned over these past years what drives you crazy and that dearest, is me. We'll never be perfect for each other and that's what I love. It brings a smile to my face after every fight we have because it proves we're alive. If we truly didn't give two shits for one another, you'd be gone, I'd be gone. We're two very different people coping with one another all for that thing we cursed long ago, love. You said you'd never experience it and I said I'd never share it. Where did things go right?

Oh hun, by the way...

Fuck the Academy.

I love these.

King of Carrot Flowers

2008-08-24T23:19:00.002-04:00

Carrot Flowers look nothing like carrots. Carrot. It's one of those words that in my mind looks spelled wrong no matter what. Don't know why.

I don't care. I'll wait outside your window for you through all kinds of weather. Fog, Drizzle, Rain, Freezing Rain, Ice Pellets, Hail, Snow and even the dreaded Graupel!

Did you know the Golden Gate Bridge is painted International Orange?

2008-08-24T04:38:00.001-04:00

Subway Poster

Blue lamp shine so bright...

2008-08-22T00:34:00.002-04:00

I'm so tired, I haven't slept a wink. I'm so tired, my mind is on the blink.

Oh yeah. I don't have anything to say or write. Oh yeah so let's dance the night away.

Words apparently only got in the way.

2008-08-20T03:28:00.002-04:00

Bananas, what are they truly made out of? I'll show you if you really want to know. It's going to be a secret though, you have to promise to never tell mommy!

Seasons

2008-08-18T16:34:00.001-04:00

I miss Autumn. It's my favorite.

I came and I saw, I conquered all.

You'll know the deed is done when you're all alone...

2008-08-17T02:17:00.003-04:00

I'm no longer employed.

Tornado! Tsunami! Typhoon!

The three brothers of wind!

Let's set sail to the sea. Go where ever the wind takes us. Conquer, pillage, plunder and yearn!

Switchboards.

I have a circuit board out in my shed if you'd like to take a look. It'll only be a few minutes.

My cousin sold his soul to the devil for artistic talent. He painted, painted and painted his years away. Every three months he'd attempt to sell his paintings and works to everyone he could find. No one would buy. It drove him mad. Why wouldn't anyone buy these magnificent works of art?! The World must have become tasteless. My cousin continued to paint and paint until he was at 100 paintings. Not one was bought.

The rejection got to him and he killed himself. The very next day, his paintings were sold.

What a dirty liar you are, Sir.

What would you do?

2008-08-16T04:45:00.001-04:00

SHACKLER'S REVENGE?!

NEW GUNS N ROSES?!

YES! YES! YES!

I'm married to consumerism, plastic and the sun...

2008-08-16T02:07:00.002-04:00

If they cut me open and let all my blood drain into a bucket so they could test it, I'd bet most of my blood is Diet Pepsi. Seriously. Most of it. A majority of it. Vast amount. Enough that they could fill cans with it, sell it to the masses and the only difference would be the color. Taste the same.

Calling All Cars, Stop Being A Bunch Of Donut Eating Fat Bastards.

I hate how doughnut is the proper spelling.

I'll never put together the entire puzzle but that's okay, I've accepted that. I prefer having something incomplete.

Whether you like it or not, you're stuck with me. I know, I wouldn't be happy in your situation either but it's just destiny. Fate. Karma. The final frontier in Life's course. The eternal bond of happiness and sorrow. God and Satan. We're caught in an unbreakable bond.
Sucks, doesn't it? Knowing I'm your other half. We both know it'll take guts to get rid of the other which can only result in a loss of mental stability. Such a shame how the ying yang works. I don't think it meant to cause such harm.

Did you hear the news? The oranges won the championship!!! New World Champions! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT LADIES AND GENTLEMEN BUT THE UNDERDOGS, THE ORANGES, HAVE PROVED THE MASSES WRONG AND CLAIMED THE VICTORY THEY DESIRED ALL SEASON. You simply have to be hear to feel this raw emotion!

I want you so badddd guitarriff.

Let the engine lube itself up. Don't waste your time with the grease. The raw chemical engineering of science will show us the way. Oh and if you weren't told by the one at the door, think too hard and you'll forget where you are. Don't think enough and you'll forget where you are. Think just right and well, oh boy, oh son, you'll find out, won't ya? Wontcha?! I always warn the boys in red to watch the bullets. I always tell the men in green keep your eyes forward with your hands around the steel. Years ago before the boys wore blue, gray was the choice of style. Not grey, don't you ever mention grey around me. We wore gray, THAT'S IT!

Layout your clothes for tomorrow morning if you choose to be on time. You'll want stuff, by stuff I do mean clothing, that matches so you don't look like a FREAKKKKKKKKKK. My mother never dressed me properly as a child. It was a sad sad sad sad point in my life. It's the reason why my socks never match. It's the reason my shirts inside out. It's the reason my jeans are too loose. It's the reason I've never gone out and bought a belt. It's the reason I'll never learn how to tie a tie and it's the reason everytime I see you in your bright yellow sunshine dress I simply DON'T MIND.

Forever ago there was a boy. This boy didn't have any toys. So he went to the dump. He found the dump. He decided to go to the dump and search for lost treasure. The dump was a land of treasure. Filled with goodies, baddies and tons of rodents.

Vinyl. Yum. Vinyl. Yum. Vinyl. Yum. Vinyl goes around and around and around. DID YOU KNOW, VINYL WAS USED ON LUNCH BOXES! LUNCH BOXES FOR CHRIST SAKE OMG.

I'll spin you right round baby right round like a record baby right round round round.

Fair enough they said, we'll take a bread and wine. Fair enough I said, I'll take your bread and wine. Let's go marching down and down into the ground like a bunch of ants returning a feast of garbage, soil and yeast.

My daughter refuses to call me daddy anymore. She said she out grew that years ago.

Porcupine. Hedgehog. Let's cross breed. Porcuhog. No. Hedgepine. No. Hedcupi. No. Hodcepig. No. Pinehog. Hogpine. Hogtie. I'm going to hogtie you until you figure out how to cross-breed a porcopine and hedgehog.

GOD DAMN. SO MUCH TO SHOW.

I met Willy Wonka once in London. He brought me to the candy shop....and well that's when he started to rap 50 cent to me, except I really don't think it was just him rappign so much as him saying.

Forever Young. Forever Dumb. Forever Mindless. Forever Young. Forever Niave. Forever FOREVER FOREVER FOREVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER. EVER EVEREVEREVEREVEREVERVERVEREVEREVER...try typing EVER with just two fingers over and over and over. EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER. well, three, thumb goes on space. E = middle finger. V R = pointer/index finger. IT'S FUN, CHALLENGING AND A TIME WASTER!

e.g. scooters, vacation, fall how dare you google tell me what to rant about.

Ctrl with: B = BOLD! BOLD BOLD BOLD oh... I = ITALIC like so THIS IS ITALIC ITALIAN p = publish but who wants to do that? Publishers, THAT'S WHO!

Join me down the river so we can go catch up with Huckleberry Finn. Teach him a lesson or two. Beat up that Tom Sawyer too. Damn him and his white washing, it's definitely no fun.

XXX = Alcohol. XXX = Porn. XXX = Vin Diesel. XXX = Ice Cube. That was Ice Cube right?

You know where to find me. Aisle 11 reading the Rolling Stone Magazine. Robert Downey Jr. on front.

Fast Forward. Rewind. Skip Chapter. Menu Button.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING DOWN THERE?! ENJOYING THE VIEW OF THE SKY?!

Interrobang !?

!? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !? !?!?!?!?!??!!!?!?!!?!!?!??!

I know this girl who got so fucking wasted and left the party in a rush. She ended up at the pond and found some ducks. Near the ducks was a huge toad. The toad just wouldn't shut its mouth, ribbiting ribbiting ribbiting a bunch. But she decided to kiss it hoping it'd be a prince.

SHE WAS WRONG.

Stinky Cheese Man & Other Fairly Stupid Tales.

Squids Will Be Squids no matter how hard you try to change their ways. That's just how nature is, man.

Okay enough nonsense for one night. TOMORROW IS A NEW DAY. TODAY IS A NEW DAY. YESTERDAY WILL NEVER BE THE SAME. CARRY ON MY WAYWARD SON!

Jesus, don't cry. You can rely on me honey...

2008-08-13T20:15:00.002-04:00

Wilco, yum.

Only three more working days and then I'm a free man! FREE MAN! FREEMAN! GORDON! MORGAN!

I have two passports. One is orange. One is red. One is full. One is empty. Music. Movies. Nummy. Nums.

Let's go dancing. Please? Please? Okay, maybe next time.

Cold champagne, bubbles on your lips. Tickles.

Tongue in cheek. GET IT OUTTA THERE.

I'll open up a business and only let you shop there.

Pull down the shade. I don't want anyone watching me while I watch them.

Keys in the door. Key into your heart. Smash your skull. Eat the brains. Play in the rain.

Our love. Mm.

When I rule the World, I will never let anyone wear your green ever. Nothing will be allowed to be that green. I refuse to ever have that color in my Great Perfect World. I don't want any signs of my weakness being out there. I don't want any signs of my only loss. You.

On a serious note on a serious page in a serious chapter in a serious novel, I once said "I'm quite serious when I say this, I want to spend every last minute of my life with you whether it's in orbit or on the ground."

iTunes is such a skank.

Please Tim, Print These Out ASAP

2008-08-10T02:50:00.001-04:00

http://www.ccisabroad.org/program.php?link=greece_thessaloniki&template=program_print.tpl

http://www.ccisabroad.org/apply/ccisapp.pdf

GET ON THAT, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.

Austin would probably be happy too if you finally got these deets in order.

Burn it down

2008-08-09T00:00:00.000-04:00

Did you know that every day acres of our precious Rain Forests are disappearing into nothing more but homes, buildings, and other things we as a society need to continue our expansion and prosperity? That these acres are being burned and torn down for hospitals, schools and shelters for the poor, sick and uneducated. How dare we rape Mother Nature like that? How Dare We!

Jug of Wine. Jug of Wine.

Tonight's main event dawns all the way from the Concrete Jungle. The juggling business man! Watch as he handles three completely different objects! A career, education and fun! How long can he do it for?! Watch in amazement!

I'm an Idiot, I know.

Red like your mother's eyes...

2008-08-08T03:05:00.000-04:00

I knocked my clock over again. I always do that.

She's stolen my heart again.

How will things be when I'm in the Ancient World? Will I find happiness? Sorrow? Despair? A Virus? Love? Money? Education?

I don't really know. My roommate says the Ancient World will only bring excitement. I'm drawn to it by the mystery. The first true step out into the World away from the protection of my family. As much as my mom thinks Massachusetts is very far from home, it's not. Greece is a whole nother step. If I can survive in Japan for two weeks with a teacher and friends. I can survive in Greece with just my roommate for months, right? Right? I hope.

Money. It's not everything. It's just something. It of course runs a majority of the World but not everything. If you can survive without making money your main concern, you're a lot stronger and smarter than most of the people around you. People let money control them. People let money make them a tool, a usage, nothing. Money makes people meaningless and invaluable. Money makes a person worth less than a piece of paper. People should be using money as a tool, not the other way around.

Me giving you 2 dollars to not potentially ruin someone else's day is well worth the price. Think about it, I bet if you would have caused that scene, she would have never kissed you. You let money treat you like a tool. I treated money like a tool to save you.

If you show the World you can't be bought, it'll make a lot of people scared. People are afraid of a man who has no price. A price, buyout, is a scape goat. If you can't converse and win over the person, money is the next option. If money is never the option though, you better hope you have some communication skills or there goes your business.

I once told a man, it's never about the shoes you wear, the clothes which cover your body, it's about the smile, handshake and voice. If you refuse to smile, refuse to shake hands, then you better damn well know how to speak. If you're a model and aren't allowed to speak, your smile and hands better do all the talking. When I say hands, I mean physique, structure, body movements. Smile is your presentation, face contact, facial looks i.e. are you good looking? If you have all three, you're Heaven Sent. If you have two, You're Good to Go. If you're only equipped with one, well you better be at the top of your fucking game. I have two 1/2 of those. I'm a damn good talker, and I'm damn good with using my hands, actions and expressions to add life into the conversation. My looks aren't top best, they're average. They're eccentric as some would say. I don't appeal to all but the ones I do appeal to fuckin damn well love me. Nothing quite like facial hair and a pink / neon blue koi fish shirt with some dickies shorts and pumas, oh also don't forget the shaggy hair.

Someone called me the other day to say they discovered a fortune. They wish I could publish it in the paper to let the World to know. I hung up on them and called the Government to let them know the number of the person and make sure taxes got a hold of it. I kid, I kid. I hung up because simply, I didn't want someone's ego going off the cliff. Who cares you discovered a fortune? Unless you're donating it or using it for good, no one should want to know about the ferrari you'll be purchasing or the 100 acre property in France. I'm probably sounding like a communist here but I'm the exact opposite. I'm a capitalist through and through. I wish everyone spent more and invested in our bloody economy but I also wish people would shut their mouthes about stupid expensive things they buy to the overall World. One thing to tell friends, another thing to call a newspaper. So if you will, let me say, Shut up. Although, I do have a guilty pleasure from time to time when it comes to watching Cribs and similar shows, so I guess I can see the thrill in showing off.

Monkeys should be allowed to take steroids too!

Chocolate Banana Milk, coming to a store near you! In super Gorilla Gorilla form!

I'd burn down London, cause the fall of Rome and put Greece in the past if it means being with you.

2008-08-08T00:30:00.000-04:00

I jumped the gun, didn't I?

2008-08-06T22:45:00.000-04:00

Spaced is okay.
Mad Men sucks.

If I'm ever look at the time while watching a movie or TV show and my thought isn't "Oh, what time is it?" but instead is "How fuckin long have I been watching this damn thing?" well, that's just not good.

That thought went through my mind several times while watching Mad Men episode 1. The first episode should always be one of the best.

Always.

Handshake Drugs

2008-08-06T02:08:00.000-04:00

Am I wrong in all of this? I'd prefer to think I'm far from that but who really knows, not me, that's for damn sure.

I'd like to go on a road trip across the USA, only listening to jazz, blues, swing and Wilco. Pretending like I'm back in the 1950's. I like Ike. Afraid a Soviet Nuke would go off at any time. Living life in fear, one day at a time. They say a man can't live in fear. I believe it.

A good friend of mine keeps telling me to calm down a bit. Stop and smell the flowers. I don't understand why I have to stop to smell the flowers. I truly think I can get just as much of a smell and satisfaction out of those flowers while running.

Eccentric. Explosive. Eccentric. Explosive. Eccentric Explosions are what I live for.

It's been a long time since I've seen you smile. Oh Beirut, you've never seen me smile.

Today I woke up and stretched.
Tomorrow I'll wake up and stretch.
Next week I'll do the same.
In two months I'll continue on this pattern.
Nine years from now I'll still be stretching.
Fifty years seem to be predict my stretching continues.
If I still stretch in 100 years it's because well...I found the Fountain of Youth.

Come on now Benjamin don't go down that alley way. We all know what happens when you go down that alley. You won't come back in one piece. You'll come back in two. TWO PIECES. How do you plan on explaining to your wife? I better hope you don't expect me to do the explaining, I'll be doing the running far from here. Far from home. Far from England.

Countless times you've outsmarted me but not now. Not anymore. I'm tired of it. I'm going back to get some schooling.

Schooling won't do you any good. It's not books I use to deceive you. It's trickery. It's mirrors. It's smoke, passion, magic. The crowds will never trust a man who runs on the books. You'll need to learn how to cut the corners, oil the gears without any lotion. Unless your definition of school has recently changed to prison, you'll be fresh out, fresh out of luck. But I'll do you favor. Just this once. I'll give you some luck. I wish you good luck, dear ol' rival. I wish you the most luck a villain could wish his nemesis in this tight situation of ours. So I bid you fare well and good luck for that the next time we meet, it will be me who's fooled next.

It will be! You will be fooled!

Travis, I'll continue to wish this luck to you but I think the only way you'll be fooling me is if I die, go to Hell and you're there too with the Devil at your side as the Devil screams "I told you, you fool, Hell does exist. There is a God upstairs but you are mine down here with the rest of these fools." If that moment in time ever comes, I will tip my hat to you Stevenson and say "For all the times I made fun of that cross around your neck, I take it back. I take it back sir." So how does the saying go then?

What saying?

...I'll see you in Hell. I'll see you in Hell, Stevenson.

But you just said...

Exactly.

*Gun Fire*

---

Well that was lame, in honor of it, let's go burn down some porches.

My wishes are sincere...

2008-08-03T03:57:00.000-04:00

I miss her. A lot. I mean, I knew I cared for her quite a bit and I know I still do but I didn't expect this to hit me now. I'm actually counting the days until I get to see her again.

28 Days. 28 Days Later she'll be in my arms. My best friend will be at my side and the ying to my yang will be living in a house with me making sure I keep my mind on the prize which is Life. A lot of my friends aren't coming back next semester but I have the three most important ones still.

My roommate / travel partner / partner in crime, Austin, is all of that. He listens to my rants, he listens to my raves. Gives me a completely different outlook on life.

My sunshine lady / best friend / psychologist, Danielle. She's the positive outlook in my life that helps me keep faith in humanity. While Austin would be the opposite side of a black & white cookie to me, Danielle would be a ying yang, mixing in certain parts. Despite our completely different ways of life and structure we click really well.

My I don't know what words to use to describe her but she makes me smile in ways no one else can, Kathy. She's in Chicago right now having the time of her life, road tripping from East Coast to Central Coast. Oh yes, I said Central Coast and just, I can't get her out of my mind. D:
I just miss looking in her big blue eyes every morning and arguing over all the dumb little things in life that don't matter and tickling her while yelling "PEE YOURSELF."

You're stale champagne and I'm a bottle of 1940 French Red Wine. You might think I'm full of class, value and warmth but I'm actually just a metaphor for a white flag.

Where have all the bubbles gone?

I'm a Tsunami and I'm here for the children. I hope Bowie's band gets big and they actually use that line/lyric. If they don't give me credit, I won't care because I'll still say everytime I hear it on the radio, "I told them to use that."

Kittens. Kittens. Kittens.

I don't get why you're acting that way, so just give up, surrender and we won't murder your mother.

I'm going to be a singer in a folk band one day, you'll see and when the day comes and my music is being downloaded illegally, I'll point to you and say "Good sir, what did I tell you all those years ago?! I'm now up on this stage, singing and playing my soul and throat out while you sit in the stands, humming along and taking notes for your music blog. I'll remember to read whatever you write and reply, I was right, you were wrong and in a world filled of opinions, it's the ones with the microphones that come out on top."

I burned down your favorite willow tree. The one we made love under for the first time. You can have the ashes if you want.

Pull the shades down, I don't want the light getting into our coffin. When the humans come to put the steak in my heart, tell them my blood already dried up.

I take my coffee black. Black like my soul or the tires on your truck. If you want we can go down to the local water hole and drink our shame to the grave.

Come on now, you know I didn't mean it. All I meant to do was show you another outlook and way of life. So what if it means burning all your possesions and family?

The friends of Jesus all went out to drink in the honor of their savior. Unfortunately, they pre-gamed, forgot to call Judas and blamed it all on Jesus's doing. Well, I think you know how that ended.

Avi!

Ev-a! Ev-a!

Do you have anything to declare?

Yeah, don't go to England.

Sneaky fuckin' Russian.

-----

Stop it.
Stop it.
Stop it.
Stop it.
Stop it.
Stop it.
Stop it.

Ok, GO!

I want you to know once this is all said and done, we'll move out to the country where we can start a family. We'll have two boys, one girl. Or maybe two girls, one boy. Okay fine, we'll have one boy, one girl.

Stop pulling my hair.

Scientists in the hall. Monkeys in a cage. Runaway train. Passenger Escorts. Purple October. Purple November. Bronze December.

Flamingo May
Lime June
Orange July
Forged August

Frosted January
Strawberry Cream February
Monkey March

No one likes Monkey March.

Nonsense April

Plain White Canvas

There once was a Cowboy. There once was a Camel. They hung out all the time. One day Cowboy said to Camel, "I have an idea. Let's convince others to do what we do." Camel immediately agreed but said, "Let's come up with a name for it first!" "How about Peer Pressure?!" "I love it, all the cool kids will be doing it."

Carbonated Seas bubble too much.

2008-07-23T01:13:00.000-04:00

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la de da de da de da

I know someone that collects dead butterflies. I never understood it. Despite what the rest of the World thinks and sees, I always viewed butterflies as fuckin' creepy. Their faces and bodies weird me out. Hm, maybe "She has a butterface" came from butterflies? Nope, I looked too much into it. It means She's hot except for her (but her, butter) face. Lame, I think my idea behind it is so much more creative.

You're the anarchy to my control

2008-07-21T18:27:00.001-04:00

I have a blue lamp. I rarely use it.

And if you'd like to know what I think about today, I'll tell you now.

It was just like any other day only the date was changed.

2008-07-20T02:46:00.000-04:00

Bending Stories
Twisting Words
Just so the bitter can become the sweeter

It's too damn hot out for a coat. I've been stressing this for weeks now but they just can't grasp that concept.

Lemonade.

I'm going to sail the seas one day, you'll see. Despite those bloody tariffs I will move on and conquer economically! You say "Oh, how can you achieve such feats without your precious tea!?" I need not tea. I need not the brown coffee beans. As long as I'm on a ship filled with my pale ale, I'll be able to make a new home in the seventh sea. I'll settle down and change my name so you won't be able to track me. Sir Honeydew no longer works under the red coat army.

Fuckin' in the Bushes

2008-07-19T14:58:00.000-04:00

If you really want to see the dark side of life, go to the moon and live in a cave with your ears covered, eyes sewed shut. I'll come get you when the shit has hit the fan.

Nothing quite says "Well, this was fun" like a day spent watching the Carnival burn down. That's one of those rare moments a photo or video just could never capture the pure essence of emotional carnage.

Right Where It Belongs

2008-07-19T03:51:00.000-04:00

Toothpaste!

It's like pushing metal plastic carts through the desert. Have you ever been to the desert?

No...

Well imagine the desert. How hot do you imagine it to be?

Pretty damn hot.

Yeah, now picture the desert as being black top concrete.

Like a parking lot?

Yeah! Now there's no camels, there's only thousand pound metal objects lined up everywhere preventing you from getting to water. Water being carts.

I'm guessing those metal objects are cars.

RIGHT! And all the arabs in the desert keep stealing all the water and whenever they don't want anymore, they leave so much crap in it!

Are you saying it's so hot in the parking lot that you're hallucinating and thinking its a desert?

No, what are you fuckin crazy? I'm just saying it's hot like the desert, that's it kid.

----

People are insane.

Oh, look out. She came in through the bathroom window. Or so they claim. She's either going to steal from you or sleep with you. Depends on how attractive you are to her. But didn't anyone tell her? Didn't anybody see? You just recently got fired from work, Sunday to Monday, Monday to Tuesday you're now free.

She claims she's always been a stripper. She somehow works 15 clubs a day, which I truly don't believe. She would grab onto my collar and demand to tell her all the secrets I knew about the police department. Since I recently lost my job I had to go find something steady. She only showed up to see what she could steal from Rob.

Oh yeah!?

Let's go out on a high note. The low notes are left for the chumps.

It's probably a lot better if you don't remember anything because if you do remember, uh oh.

What are the two dots between the hour and minutes on clocks called? I say we call them dividers of time.

I can picture myself when I'm older having a garden and despite my lack of love towards it, weeds will always grow to show me even if you refuse to work, life will go on with or without you.

THE BREAK DOWN!?

I'm going to write you a letter about all the good times we used to have. Driving down the highway like we didn't care about the price of gas. I can still remember me always telling you the Barenaked Ladies always said It's All Been Done. Whether you take their word for it or not is all up to you but I'm ready to believe if anyone figured that out, it was definitely the Canadians. I heard you say, The Past Was Much More Fun. Of course you would say the Past is Much More Fun. The Present is only a few seconds, so how can that be more fun than all of the past combined unless at that moment in time you're winning the lottery while orgasming. The future can't be fun until you live it. Man, actually thinking about it now, the Canadians have no clue what they're talking about. I guess that's why they call Ham, Bacon.

I decided to set up an appointment for dinner, okay, a reservation. I prefer the word appointment because when you're having dinner for business, it's more about work than really eating. Never order the clams. Don't ever order the clams. Shrimp is okay. Steak is better. Burger makes you look like a fool. Salad a pansy. Something unique shows you are the curious type with a new approach on life. Remember to not out drink your co-workers. Everyone loves to hate that guy. Oh you don't want to be that guy. Look at the table. If you can't point out which one of them is that guy, you're him. CONGRATS YOU ARE NOW A FOOL! ONE HUGE FOOL! Get your scarf out and choke yourself with it. Wait till Autumn and hang from a tree.

Forever young Forever tough Forever young Forever tough Forever young Forever tough Forever young Forever tough I want you to know you'll never be tough and no one stays young, no matter how many times you tell yourself.

Start with one idea and dance from there. Who knows what partner will be at your side in the end.

My phone is red. Your phone is blue. If you mix them together you get a failure of communication.

The sun doesn't go to sleep. The Moon just rapes it.

It rolls right on. It being the seasons. If you let them begin that is and your plans consist of taking the Big King down. Down to China Down. Down Under. Down the street. Down to the place we once knew as The School Of Hard Knocks. Up Up Down Down Left Right Left Right B A. That kind of Down. I'm So Down Kinda Down.

I taught that man how to sing. He wanted to sing opera but I decided on country instead. His synthesizers could never get in tune so I taught him how to dance instead. Go to his show every fifth thursday and you'll see the first white man who can sing and play a tube with ease. At the same time that is.

Foreplay/Long Time. The best thing to come out of Boston was the band, Boston. The Band came from Ontario Canada. But no one truly gave a shit about them until Bobby D took them under his wing. That's just how Bobby D was. I knew him well. I know him well. I used to look like him, act like him and out perform him. But it's been such a long time, I think I should get going. Time doesn't wait for me, it keeps on rolling.

DISTANT HIGHWAY YEAH?!

I GOT TO KEEP ON CHASING THE DREAM!!!!

Jethro Tull loves you. Thick As A Brick. I may make you feel but I can't make you think.

LOVE IS IN THE SINK!? MY SINK?!

Interrobang. Let's get going now. You got it? I got it. She's got it. But he's lost it. We'll never know where to go from here but that's okay because he's now lost. We won't ever see him again. You won't ever. She won't ever. But he will because he's lost with himself.

Scooters, Vacation, Fall. All you need to remember is how to head West. Thataway GO!