Woke up, fell out of bed, dragged a comb across my head.

How do you top another musician? You do what he does best and make it better.

Those extra three seconds of I'm Looking Through You on the US version of Rubber Soul, just makes the song that wee bit better.

I'll never get tired of waking up next to you

And staring into those big ol' eyes

Oh come on, it won't be such a big deal.

Let's rent, not buy.

The market is much too high

For me, for us to be able to afford

The beautiful house on the beach

You always wished for

We'll rent now under someone else's roof

And save away those pennies

Until we can trade them in for pebbles of sand

On the shore

I promise you one day

You'll get the balcony looking out into the sea

I won't quit my job

And I'll keep myself still

Holding out through all the pencil pushing

Executive blood boiling office world

Just so can I get you the white picket fence

Around the kelly green grass

It sounds pretty cliche

But at that point in our life

I think that is what we'll need

To settle down and stop swimming against

reality's tough current

Smiles await you when you rise

I promise I'll be everything you want me to be

The musical talent of George

The peaceful soul of John

The maturity of Paul and

With a little bit of the gookyness of Ringo Starr.

Boy, you're going to carry that weight

A Long Time

I promise you I won't have any issues investing your love

There'll be plenty of buyers

Especially in such a heated market like the one

We see today

You would think families would stop ordering out

Put aside the take out

Maybe learn to cook for a change

But no, it's strange, they just simply can't get enough

Of what you do best

You will be this agency's ace in the hole

In this harsh economic climate

People are forgetting how to love

And I know, you'll help them out

Rain or shine.

I'm a critic of everything. Maybe I should have my own column on the front page of Life.

Why don't I write like I used to? What is it? What's wrong?

So hear me out,

Maybe we should start to be a little more..

You know, what's the word I'm thinking of?

Cliche

That's it, you always know the missing words in my sentence.s

It seems to be that we're drifting apart from society

And I started to notice this when your mother

Bought us a new table cloth

And I just gave her a blank stare

Why do we need a new table cloth?

What's wrong with this one?

What's wrong with the one we have been using for seven years thus far?

I'm out of touch of reality and the norms

Maybe I should read more.

Where's my Catcher in the Rye?

My father would take me out fishing

Once a week, Every week

Throughout my summer break

He told me we were looking for Mermaids

We'd find the most beautiful two

And they'd take us away from the terrible

Place called Land

I'd always ask,

"What about mom? But...what about mommy?

We can't leave mommy. She can come too right?"

And he'd always say,

"She's not made for the sea, she'll be on land until the day

She dies."

When my parents divorced,

It hit my Father harder,

I guess because well, it was out of his hands.

He didn't want to keep carpenting,

His hobbies all fell apart and he took his savings

Bought himself a boat and left shore.

Mother moved to Tennessesse with her new lover

He's a lawyer

Not that it really matters

Well, to my Father it does,

He's convinced her new husband won her over

With his devilish looks and split snake tongue.

I wonder if he meant the sexual inneundo.

It's strange to watch your Father's heart break

My parents had seen mine shattered at least three times

"There's plenty of fish out in the sea."

Of course there is but you'll never find that one in particular again.

Maybe you'll find a new breed.

You'll get that better catch

But it's never the same fish,

Actually, if you set them back out, it could be

But let's take that possibility out.

I couldn't tell him that. I couldn't pat him on the back,

"Dad, don't worry, you'll find a better one!"

What catch will be better than a high school sweet heart

Who gave birth to his only son?

When he pulled into a dock,

I was the only one he called.

He'd only be there for a few days

If I wanted to see him

If I wanted to talk

I'd have to fly out there and meet with him

"I'll eventually pay you back for the ticket,

When I get it all back together."

I never let him pay me back.

"What have you been doing Dad, out on sea I mean? Thinking?"

"Mostly. I brought a bunch of calendars with me from previous years

I have been trying to pin point the day your mother stopped loving me."

Well that was garbage.

I wish I was a witty cynical bastard like John Cleese.

Post 101.

I stared into the ocean yesterday

I went through trails in nature only a few blocks away from my house

Frozen Yogurt

Friendship, it's beautiful.

I wonder if anyone saw us last night.

Did they laugh when she couldn't find her keys?

Girls have such big bags.

"I stopped writing...maybe out of spite."

That's such a lame excuse on my part. I stopped writing because I'm afraid I lost it. I did lose something, the spark, the inspiration. I just need someone to be a fire in my life. I don't need a love. I don't need an emotional whirlwind. I just need a star to shoot for. I'm tired of games where I won't know the outcome. Let's write it all down on paper, shall we? Let's make the rules. Let's make the guidelines. Let's ensure it'll end with both of us winning, I'm tired of losing sometimes and I'm tired of seeing the female cry if the game doesn't go her way.

Transparency. Glass really can be a beautiful thing. The water can be beautiful too when you can see right through it. We saw a horseshoe crab.

I really want to do this one.

Okay, story time, ready?

I wonder when I'll figure it all out

Or at least a good enough portion

That I'll be able to say to my children

"Trust me on this...you don't ever want to do that"

When will my Sherlock Holmes instincts kick in?

Why can't I figure out the mystery?

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Can you open your eyes?

Okay okay okay okay, let's start from the beginning. I don't know where life will take me, I'm only 21 years old. Take it a day at a time. Let us do one step, let's two step and maybe skip the rest of the way down the block.

Frozen Yogurt. Walks around the block. Ocean dwelling sitting at the dock. Maybe we can buy this house or maybe just jump from place to place hoping it all works out. I want to do just what this situation needs me to. He stole your guitar hero and I don't want to steal your heart. Open up your open up your throat. Horseshoe crabs are never same when they're on their on back. Flip 'em over. Flip 'em over. Pick a park, pick a bench, I'll bring a book, you can bring yours. We'll read a few chapters and exchange them between each other every time. I'll take pauses to stare at the sky, you'll take your breaks to watch the swans float on by. You say it's an Alien. I say it's a plane. You say it's a Star, a Planet, nope, Aliens. I'll say it's a plane and I was right, there it goes, flying on by.

I looked like a 1970s Cocaine Dealer from Miami, if you can be seen with me in public like that, it must mean for something.

They blew up all their poppy fields. Serves them right.

I'm a New York City wonder. You'll find me next door to the city's boroughs. I'll live out on the Island and commute into the city's lagoon.

Red Hot Chili Peppers.

Sit up straight, I'm on a double date.

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My hair looks so childish. It has the hook like Lucas from Mother 3. Maybe I should bleach it blonde and wear his lame little outfits.

The windows are getting dirty. I think someone should clean them. We should probably clean them. I think a lot of things are getting dirty in my life and I think it all needs cleaning. I know you've been offering to help. I know you've been suggesting for a long time now to stop using the closet as a hiding place for my junk but that's just what I'm used to. I don't want you to help me clean. I don't need you to help me clean. I think I want to just sit and feel filthy.

We can go down to the carnival and look at all the old couples. We can look. We can watch. We can stare. We can talk about what we never were. I don't see myself being 70 with anyone sharing Candyfloss. I always found it strange the only choices are ever blue or pink. Once I asked my Father for a different colour because he was running the Candyfloss machine at the school fair and he mixed the two and made me purple. My father made me purple Candyfloss because why not? He could.

I know this is a pen. I know how to count by threes. There's no way I'd forget what comes after seventeen. I'll tell you how to play poker, rummy and solitaire. I could probably teach you how to build a home personal pc. I could teach a puppy how to sit, how to shake hands/paws, run and be silly but I can't teach anyone how to love. If I'm lucky I'll be able to go a long time without seeing another mind die. I don't want to be scarred. I'm too tough to be hurt. I'm too strong to cry.

Penny. Nickle. Dime. Quarter. Half-Dollar. Dollar. The half-dollar was obviously shafted. He's the younger brother of the dollar. He will always live in the shadow of the Bill. See what I did there?

One day I think I'll dump everything at University and move onto bigger and better things like the seven seas. Men among men will teach me anything and everything they know. I'll be able to tie so many knots and trust me, you'll see, I will arrive at a new dock somewhere in the caribbean with a better mindset or will I? Whenever I plan out tomorrow, yesterday tries its best to sneak up on me. Oh yesterday, you had your time and your chance but now today is here to show me the path and whether it's right or wrong I can always look towards tomorrow in hope I'll stay strong.

Jesus H. Christ

HIS LAST NAME IS CHRIST?

No silly.

Oh, look out!

Didn't anybody tell her?

So we're heading down to Philly to show the rents what it's like to be on your own and I don't think they're really ready to hear about all of the antics of my half-witted sister. I say she's half-witted because this one well, you know what, ask her why I call her, it makes for a better story after she tells your HER side.

Didn't anybody tell her?

Didn't anybody see?

Sundays on the phone to Monday.

Tuesdays on the phone to me.

Oh Tuesday, you're such a fucking slut.

Loud drums. Heavy bass.

I always picture myself, sitting there, staring at you in disbelief. Your mouth is moving a mile a minute, everything you're saying is meaningless, artifical, plastic credit card bullshit that you keep using and damn, well your payment is going to be so huge, I really don't think you will ever be able to afford to pay me back for all that time you wasted, wait what? I will always get coffee because I can't enjoy coffee anymore, and I need something that will last me forever so I can focus so much time and energy on that. Say something stupid? Sip. Retard? Sip. Mind-blowing dumb? Sip. Crazy? Sip. You'veGottaBeKiddingMe? Sip. Sip. Sip. Sipppp. I'll make sure of it that you always leave before me. I'll need to sit there and sip on that coffee while you're gone. "I can't believe she said all of that."

If you always get up late, you'll never be on time.

I'll be doing something important someday. I will be branding a piece of the World. I'll be building bridges, buildings and communication webs with my bare hands. That's speaking figuratively, don't let it get to your head. No, I will not be a construction worker. No, I will not be a social worker. I will be a crafter. Not of fine arts or pottery but of the social structors we'll need to thrive. Thrive. I love that word. I will thrive.

The kids are on fire in the bedroom.

If I do build an empire, I wonder if one day I'll just throw it away and hand it to the people, just to send a message to the other Kings and Queens. Everything you have will return to them. The heights of your tallest buildings will crumble and taste the ground. Your throne can't stay in the clouds forever. No peace treaty will remain war free. Up = Down. You need balance in your life. You can control somethings but not everything. Even with Legos and Play-doh, you can't do everything. You can't control it all. You're limited, the directions never say instruct that.

Oh come on, you knew from the beginning the concert had to end. The fireworks had to stop. Enjoy them while they last. Smell that flower, that rose, that violet before it dies. Your favorite musician won't see 99 neither will your parents. It's all stepping stones. It's all bricks in the wall. It's all building points.

What am I ever getting? I was told tonight, I'm rationale. I'm focused. I was raised properly to respect my surroundings. Most of the people my age don't. I criticize that and I yell. I bash and complain. I rip to shreds everything around me in hopes of understanding. Why? Why? Why? I'd tear it apart to the DNA if I could. I'll bring it to the Pearly Gates in the end if I can. I'm beginning to think, this is normal though. This is how it's supposed to be. I'm ahead of the game but I might be losing out on the time where the freedom is there for the calling before it's taken away.

This Is Life There Are No Right Answers

It's all a system. It's all their system. It can be your system if you choose to accept it but you don't have to. You do not have to play the game. Nothing forces you to play the game. You choose every day to roll the dice. You choose continuously over and over to keep picking up those cards. Take and play the hand you're dealt or fold and go home. You can even go all in if you'd like, I won't force you how to play your hand, I might suggest it, I might scream it, but I will never force you to play a hand you don't want to play. I might scold you tonight, tomorrow, for a year or forever about how you shouldn't have played that hand or how you should have but you know what, in the end, on my death bed, I will not take any of those moments to heart because it was your hand and you ultimately decide how it is played. Don't let anyone else play your hand.

Go out there and make a name for yourself.

Bring back the Wild West if you must.

There's nothing wrong with wearing a scarf. I find them stylish. I find them cute. I find them warm and everything in between. I love having a scarf that was made for me, made for someone and passed down through a salvation army to get to me. I love purple ones and blue ones and even pink, orange and green ones. I love them in the cold. I love them in the heat. I love thick and thin. I love short ones and ones that go down to my knees. They're comfortable. They're warm. They make me think of home and the ones I love and the ones that love me. I love to nap in them.

God made the Automobile.

Oh baby baby baby please, how long am I supposed to wait? I think about you nightly, oh can you tell I'm losing sleep? What am I supposed to do? It's hard to stay cool, when you smile at me, I get nervous everytime you speak.

My bed is too big for just me.

My bed, actually, is just perfect for me.

Did you know that I'm going to own this town someday and I'll change its name. I'll burn it down and start a new. I'll remove all traces of you because that is how I want it.

One day I'll paint the town your favorite colour and burn it down because well, simply that is how I roll.

Let's run away together.

You're not the Princess I grew up with.

What did you do with our Queen?

I ATE HER!?!?!

Blow out that Cherry Bomb, for me?

I love birthday cakes, I love cakes in general. The cake is not a lie and I hate to break the news to you but it's not funny. Memes are funny for a week. A month, tops. Well, that is according to my personal opinion.

According to my two cents, I have twenty pennies.

You're wrong, I'm right. He's lost. She's gone.

So much facial hair!

Chad Vangaalen is so brilliant in all of the things he does but some songs mostly because of his voice, can just be so fucking eerie.

The bags under my eyes keep getting bigger. I want sleep. I want peace and quiet.

"I'll find you and I'll kill you, I'll find you and I'll kill you, I'll find you and I'll kill you."

I don't ever talk about my problems in great detail. I'm a story teller and to be a great story teller, you need to have an understanding of the task at hand, you need to be able to fill in all the holes with detail. I can't talk of my own problems. I don't know where they began and I have no clue when they'll will end. I need clear beginning, middle and end to discuss something on this kind of subject.

I need to stop reading things about her.

Just take a deep breath.

I wonder if this is how she felt.